Life's Complicated
by epicdisney
Summary: Freddie's mother is murdered Freddie's father comes and abducts Freddie he takes Freddie away for 2 years. When Freddie moves back to Seattle he seemslike a different person. Everyone wants to know what happened during those two years that changed Freddie
1. Chapter 1

Freddie P.O.V

"Hola senarita's," Freddie walked into Carly Shays apartment. Freddie wore a striped shirt with brown capris. He had on a goofy wide grin on his face. It was his birthday he was finally turning 14. The blond headed demon kept on bragging how Carly and she were already 14 although now they were the same age. Somehow, Freddie felt today would be the day to change the rest of his life. So far, it had been a good day. It was Saturday so he slept in. His mother had not felt the need to smash his fruits. Also today in Icarly he would be hosting! Freddie could not think of a better way to spend his birthday co-hosting with Carly while Sam held the camera or rubbing it in Sam's face afterwards!

Carly sat next to Sam on a new banana shaped couch. When Freddie noticed the new awkward couch, he said, "Why in the world are you sitting on a large banana!"

Carly gave a light laugh. Her eyes looked straight into Freddie. Freddie felt himself melt at the gaze. "Carly you're so PUR-TY." Once he realized what he had said he blushed furiously which Cary, thought was cute.

"Don't make me barf up my lunch," Sam said her head lazily rolled toward Freddie.

"Sam," Carly scolded, "Stop it. Anyway this banana is Spencer's muse for his new sculpture."

Before he could ask what in the world, could Spencer find inspiring about this banana but he stopped. He knew just as well as everyone else in the room Spencer could find anything inspiring. He once had made Freddie hold a squash for 2 hours straight. He though the way Freddie held squash was inspirational. Freddie could never understand Spencer and his random and crazy way of looking at things.

At that moment, Spencer burst from his room covered in yellow paint. He walked in front of the gang and said, "I'm yellow," He then pursed his lips and walked off to the kitchen behind the counter out of sight.

"There is something wrong with him," Freddie murmured. Sam happened to have heard and snickered at his comment.

"So we should get started on I Carly now," Carly said getting up and stretching her legs. OH, she has beautiful legs. Carly had the curves in all the right places. She had beautiful brown eyes and long brown hair. After Freddie had broken out of his trance, he realized it was only 2:00.

"Cary it's too early for ICarly." Freddie asked curiously. "I know," she said mysteriously, "Were going to record the show today. So all of us can celebrate your birthday."

Freddie smiled touched at the fact that she would think of him. She was so caring unlike her. Suddenly Freddie's thoughts were on Sam. Who was now eating some chili where she had gotten God knows where.

"Sam," Carly sighed. Carly wrestled the tubberware full of chili from Sam. She finally grabbed it and disappeared behind the counter to put it back in her fridge.

"Ugh that was some good chili." She said with a mouth full. She still had one giant spoon full of chili dripping on the carpet. Sam Freddie thought furiously. Freddie's Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder started to kick in over drive. Freddie had never told his friends that he had it. It never occurred to him to tell them about it.

"SAM STOP THAT," Freddie screamed. Yes, he knew it was over the top but it just came out.

Sam P.O.V

Sam was mad. Sam was not use to people calling her out like that. It mad her mad so she flinged the cold chili at the dorks face. Although Sam forgot how good that chili was the spices, the tangy sauce it was SO good. Spencer made great chili. She could not stand it. Sam flung herself at Freddie and licked his face clean. After the chili was gone, she realized the nub actually smelled good like a mixture of sweet and spice. She licked his face one more time just to annoy him. She then got off him and headed off to the studio as if nothing happened.

Freddie P.O.V

When Sam flung herself at him dropping him to the ground he knew what would happen. She would use her tongue full with germs and lick him down. It was SO gross. First, she throws food at him contaminating his skin. The next thing she licks him. Finally, when all of the chili was off and she had given him one slow lick. Freddie rather liked it. For some reason while his body ran to the bathroom scrubbing his face with scented soap. Freddie realized he would not mind if it happened again.

****** I hoped you liked it!**


	2. Chapter 2

**** Oh Just want to be clear, farther into the story the rating will be more M.**

**M for:**

_**Physical Abuse**_

_**Laungage**_

_**Cutting and other bodily and mental harm.**_

**Disclaimer: I don't own I Carly: if I did Freddie & Sam would be married already. LOL**

Freddie P.O.V

The girls warmed up for the show with silly dances and practiced a few bits. Freddie realized they should get started now. "Come on let's start the show" Freddie handed the fragile camera to Sam. Freddie suddenly realized his equipment was in danger.

"Why don't I just handle the tech stuff Carly? Sam doesn't know anything about tech stuff and she's going to break my stuff." Freddie whined.

"It's your birthday you should get a chance to host. Your hosting that's final but Sam handling tech equipment isn't a good idea though." Carly said nervously as she eyed Sam who now retrieved the chili Spencer had made for Carly. Carly sighed. She twisted her hair into a ponytail. "Sam you're taking my hosting place. I can't trust you with any electronics."

Sam started to whine about her laziness and how she did not feel like hosting but in the end, Carly convinced her to do it. Freddie was still amazed how Carly could persuade Sam into doing almost anything. Even though Freddie was glade, Sam was not handling his equipment. Now Sam was whining in his ear how she did not want to stand next to him and get his geekness. "Shut Up," Carly screeched at Sam. Sam immediately hushed.

"Ok we start in 5," Carly looked so cute with her hair up. She sounded all in charge. She was so cute.

"4," Sam started fidgeting next to me moving closer towards me.

"3," Our arms touched. I felt tingles move all the way down my arm.

"2," Sam now stood on her tippy toes trying to reach my height. I was confused.

Carly pointed toward us just as I would do. Sam suddenly grabbed my head and screamed loudly. I crumpled to the ground my ears ringing. Sam started the introduction.

"I'm Sam! And this is," She grabbed me by my hair and pulled me up towards the cameras view, "And this is Fredlump, and this is ICARLY!" When I finally repositioned myself I realized just how pissed I was. I never really got much face time on ICarly and it seems every time I do get face time i get embarrassed by Puckett or my mother. Although I would not let Puckett ruin my day but I am, happy I do not have to deal with my mother.

20minutes into the show*

"Ok that's all the time we have left. Therefore, everyone remember eat some pie and do not get your head stuck in a toilet. Trust me it's embarrassing if firefighters had to pull your head out of a toilet." Freddie said. He was having the time of his life being there and being funny. It was fun suddenly Freddie started to wonder if he really wanted just to be the tech person. Suddenly he knew why he had felt today would change his life. Freddie wanted change. He did not want to be the punching bag anymore he wanted to be something more. A loud noise interrupted Freddie's thoughts and Sam's silly goodbye to the audience. "What the . . .," Freddie's mother had busted into the room carrying a small picnic basket.

"FREDDIE," His mother screamed with her high-pitched voice. "Why are you on camera you're supposed to be behind the scenes not practicing around on the internet. "

His mother was now in full view of the camera. Carly, who was about to stop the show, was pushed by Sam as she told her to continue. A few seconds into their small fight, Sam ripped the camera away from Carly and recorded every detail of Freddie's conversation. The pride and joy that had once filled him slowly seeped out of him.

"What if a predator saw you?"

"Mom I've been on the show a bunch of times"

"Well I must have missed it but your to never go on the internet and have your face on some perverts monitor." Her voice seemed to get louder. He felt lightheaded.

"Come on," she said she grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the studio and then out of the Carly's apartment. Once there were in the confidence of their home, he simply . . . busted.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. You humiliate me on the internet and I won't hear the end of this forever."

"Your safety's more . . ."

"Shut up," Freddie interrupted, "I'm tired of that same excuse. I HATE YOU."

Freddie walked to his room and slammed the door. He plopped on his galaxy war sheets. They were old and worn out but comfortable. He sunk into them and wanted to dream and get away from reality and that is what he did


	3. Chapter 3

Freddie P.O.V

A scream filled the air. He would hear this sound when there was no noise. This here would be the scene that would haunt his dreams. This is what would change his life. He woke up with a jolt. He almost flew across the room to find the source of the sound. He went into his mother's room and found she was not there. The bedspread was a mess and lamps and the contents of her drawers were on the floor. Another blood-curdling scream filled the air. He ran to the living room. The scene horrified him; a hooded figure stood over her mother as her hit her again and again and again. Freddie could not move his body was paralyzed. When the hooded man found out Freddie was there, he ran for the door. Freddie caught a glimpse of the silhouette of the man's face, a nose that stood at an irregular angle and black hair.

His mother lay in a pool of crimson colored blood. Freddie cautiously took a step toward his limp mother. He gagged at the sight of his mother's mangled body. He dropped to the floor. No matter how disgusted he was at the sight of the blood, he picked his mother up. He looked in her eyes that were caked with blood. Her mouth moved slightly. A slight whispering sound filled my ears. I leaned in closer. I felt fat tears escape my eyes. She whispered to me, "Beware of him. Run away and hide. Freddie I just love you. I am sorry if I burdened you. I am sorry. I am sorry. I'm sorry." She said repeatedly. She said it until her voice was barely a whisper. She said it until her eyes closed.

She went cold in my arms. "Mom," Freddie said hesitantly. When he realized what had happened, that his mother had died in his arms he screamed. When Carly came, he only screamed louder. Carly had brought a tall figure with her. He could not identify the person because his vision was blurred with his tears and _her_ blood. When the figure tried to pull his mother away from him Freddie held tighter. He held onto her. He buried himself into his mother's cold chest. Freddie let out one of his own bloodcurdling scream. He found himself ripped from his mother. A heavy built police officer had pushed him out his apartment. The cop spook to the Spencer who had to be the man Carly brought with her telling him to keep Freddie quiet.

Spencer P.O.V

Spencer pushed Freddie into the apartment with all his might. When Spencer found Freddie hugging is mother who was died, he himself almost cried. Freddie had pounded him when had tried to pull him off his mother. Once Spencer had finally gotten Freddie in his apartment, Freddie tore at everything. Freddie pushed down his art sculpture. He pushed down everything in sight. Freddie screamed and shouted hysterically. Spencer finally controlled him and held onto him tight. He pushed him down to the couch and put his arms over him to keep him still. Freddie tried to push him off but he would not let him. Only five minutes later Freddie had settled down. His cries now on muffled by the couch cushion. Spencer saw at the corner of his eye Carly looked horrified at the scene. Spencer got up finally to ask Carly if Ms. Benson had survived but by the look of Carly's face, he knew.

Freddie's mother had been murdered

***I know its short but I thought it was a thinker. I thought that it was a lot to take in. Me personally I do not like the way I wrote this chapter it could have been more emotional but still give advice & feedback**


	4. Chapter 4

Freddie's P.O.V

When he reached consciousness, Freddie could not open my eyes. His body would not let him. His body was sore. Freddie finally found the strength, lifted his arm, and forced his eyes open. The bright light stung his eyes he winced. His fingers were caked with dry blood. He was horrified his clothes were stained with blood, which is filled with bacteria and was disgusting. Freddie ran to Carly's sink, rinsed his hands, and ripped of his shirt and pants. He stood in his underwear frantically rubbing his body with water from the sink.

"Why am I at Carly's house anyway," Freddie mumbled. That is when Carly came down stairs. Her hair dangled in all directions. Her eyes were puffy from crying. "Why are you in your underwear?" She said amused but her voice was low and cracked.

"Germs, so much blood. Carly why am I here? Why do you look so sad? Carly I have to go my mother will worry." Freddie said hurriedly, his thoughts only on the non-scented soap that awaited him in his bathroom. Freddie grabbed his bloodstained clothes and headed for the door. "No Freddie don't go . . .," Freddie was already was out the door. Freddie's memories came back with a rush. He could now feel her limp cold body in his arms. Yellow police tape coved the door. The door was banged and broken so it was open. Freddie could see his apartment was covered in blood. A bunch of blood still stained his carpet. He fell to his knees. Tears once again filled his eyes, this time he willed them not to fall. Carly helped him up and without a word hugged Freddie. Once Freddie smelled her peach shampoo he let, his tears fall. His mother wore peach shampoo and nothing else. She swore that he was allergic to all other fruits except peach. That only made him cry harder and hold tighter to Carly.

3 days later The Funeral*

They had just buried his mother. They were now at the west field of the cemetery where they held the reception. Images where a blur. People would come to talk to him commiserating his loss. Although Freddie did not listen. He did not even pretend to, his eyes would glaze over to the east part of the area where they had buried his mother. All Freddie could think was she should not have died. If anything, Freddie should be with her, 6 feet under.

"Freddie," Sam said. She tapped his hand softly. Sam had been nice to him since his mother died. Every time she would slip an insult, she would look to see if he was ok. Freddie hated it the sympathy. It suffocated him. Its true Freddie had not spoken since it had dawned on him that his mother was dead. He had not eaten either . . . well willingly. Carly and Sam forced meals down his throat for 2 days until he finally started eating.

"You have to make your speech, here," Sam handed him index card with small legible scribbles.

"Just in case you can't think of anything to say," She patted his back and gently pushed him to the podium. She had given him a small hug, she smelled of bittersweet pineapples. "Knock em died Fredweird," She said hesitantly. She looked at me as if he would break into a million pieces. The truth is he already had, he just stop crying about it. Freddie stepped to the podium. He let out a sigh and put his mouth close to the mike

He looked at the cards and realized he could not do it. He could not read someone else is epitaphic. It would be false, his mother deserved more. He ripped the cards in half and looked at Sam to apologize but Sam was brightly smiling. He smirked she knew he would not so it. Before he spoke, he put the cards together and read the script.

_I knew you would not do it now make an awesome speech._

Freddie smiled and spoke.

"My mother was crazy," Freddie looked at the reactions it was priceless.

"All who knew my mother knew about her over nurturing hold on me. She was an over protective maniac," He sighed glad to get it out. Although Spencer looked as though he was about to rip him off stage and Sam looked nervous as well. He knew he had to get to the point.

"At home she was just as crazy don't get me wrong but different. She cared about everything she was so nurturing. She was so strong, all she ever did was protect me but I never thanked her. I never appreciated her," Freddie felt tears run down his face but he did not stop. "She sung to me every night the same song until I fell asleep and me going to sing it," Freddie walked back to the band that had been playing the slow depressing music and borrowed the singer's guitar. Freddie abandoned the podium and went to the center where everyone could see him. He sighed and sung:

**(Pay attention to the lyrics it shows how Freddie really feels) A/N**

When I see your smile  
Tears run down my face  
I can't replace  
And now that I'm strong  
I have figured out  
How this world turns cold  
and it breaks through my soul  
And I know I'll find  
deep inside me  
I can be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all (though it all)  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.  
Seasons are changing  
And waves are crashing  
And stars are falling all for us  
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter  
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart  
Please don't throw that away  
Cuz I'm here for you  
Please don't walk away and  
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will  
Pull my strings just for a thrill  
And I know I'll be okay  
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven  
{fade way}

Sam P.O.V

When he sang the song, she swore it was an angel. He sounded beautiful. She never knew the nub could sing. Sam had been treating Freddie a lot nicer since the accident and it drove her crazy! She knew she sounded selfish but she wanted things to be back to the way they were. She would torture Freddie and he would lamely retort. Freddie had not spoken a word to her though and she wanted to talk to him. You could say she missed him. She sighed and pushed the thoughts away as she reached for her eighth appetizer in a row.

Unknown P.O.V

He saw him singing from a distance. He looked just like Janine. The way he sung with so much emotion it moved him but not enough to stop his plan. Some people say he was a criminal but he knew otherwise. He was much more. He saw things in a light that other people could not. Their minds clouded with sin. He was here to get rid of sin. Those who would not listen to him about the measures necessary to get rid of sin should be punished. Janine used to be clean she used to know right from wrong, but she made a mistake. There is no room for mistakes in this world. Therefore, she had to be chastised. Yes, Janine had to die but it was also a test for Freddie to test his courage and bravery. He had failed and over the past three days, Freddie had made many mistakes, which was bad. Freddie now had to be punished and he could punish Freddie as much as he wanted until he was cleansed. He was his father after all . . . and father knows best.

Carly p. o. v

After Freddie had sung, he somewhat disappeared into the crowd, **sinking in an ocean of faces.** After she had found him, she shyly approached him

"Hey," Freddie said shyly. His hands were tucked in his pockets. His hair messier than Carly had ever seen it. It was . . . cute.

"You were amazing. I didn't know you could sing?"

"Me either I thought I sucked," He let out a light laugh.

"No," She playfully shoved him, "You were great."

Carly was glad that Freddie was finally getting back to his old self but you had to be a fool not to notice it was all an act. A few minutes into their conversation, Freddie announced he was going to visit his mother's grave and he had left her.

Freddie P.O.V

Freddie had made the conversation with Carly as short as possible. Freddie could not seem to keep himself still, all he could think about was his mother's grave. He needed to see it ~ alone. He rubbed his hands in his hair as he walked towards the east field. He had two prickly bright white roses in his hands. Freddie started to like the silence until it happened. It was like a flashback that exploded in his head like loud obnoxious fireworks. He could hear his mother's frightful scream and her dying plea all at the same time. It hurt so much; Freddie began to squeeze the thorn-covered roses. He could feel the blood oozing out of his hand. He began to realize, the cuts seemed to release the stress out of his body instead of blood. He finally regained control of his own mind and pushed the screams out of his head. He instantly dropped now blood covered white rose to inspect the damage. His hand covered in small scratches. He wiped his hands on his pants; he then heard a voice behind him.

"Hello Freddie," A deep voice said. The voice gave him chills down his back.

Freddie turned around and looked at the figure. Fear paralyzed his body, which was a feeling he had felt before. The man that stood before him had a nose that looked like it had been broken several times. He had greasy ink black hair sleeked back into a ponytail. His eyes were black and ghoulish looking straight at him . . . challenging him.

"Freddie," His voice hissed my name with certain authority, "It's time to go home."

His hand reached out to him. Freddie tried to scream but a cloth filled with a strong scent mumbled it.

"Freddie, you will never see your old life again

For now you are renewed."

**A/N: Whoa now that was cool scared myself there with that last paragraph. Also song is by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. You are Guardian Angel and no this is not a song fiction. Yes, I may put one or two songs here and there just because I think it enhances the scene but it is not a song fiction.**

**Plzz review and stuff it makes me think you do not like it if you do not.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sett 2 years after the funeral. I know I should have established a little more about what happened after the funeral but I thought it was something I would just put in this chapter pluss it adds to the mystery.!**

**Two or three weeks B4 Freddie's 16****th**** birthday or you could say MS Bensons death day. In addition, if you did not get it JANINE IS MS BENSON! LOL**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ICARLY if I did I WOULD BE MARRIED TO FREDDIE 4GET SAM! Lol enjoy!**

**Carly's P.O.V**

Carly yawned. She stretched her legs as she got out of her room. She still could not get over her room Spencer had made for because it had burned down just a few days ago. Carly was finally 16, she had a tricked out room and her own web show anniversary coming up. How could life get better? Carly knew how life would get better if Freddie were here. Carly then scolded herself, it was her birthday she had to leave those thoughts behind. I guess she had to finally accept the worst. Freddie was dead.

Although Carly tried to force herself not to think about the unfortunate events she couldn't help herself. She happened to be doing it a lot lately.

Carly sighed. Two years to long, she had agenized over the fact that maybe Freddie was alive. After all those months of police searches and investigations, hope still rotted in her brain. It was like a parasite that infested her brain convincing her that everything would turn out ok. It did not. This time positive thinking and charm were not going to get her anywhere. This time she would have to face the fact. Freddie Benson was as good as dead. Even though she had unconsciously accepted this fact long ago, it still chilled her. She pushed the thoughts out of her mind as she put on her new outfit and assororys picked out exceptionally for her birthday, this was her day and she would not let these depressing thoughts get to her.

She ran down stairs to her living room where she found Sam sprawled on the couch.

"Sam," Carly giggled, Sam snorted in return. Carly went to the fridge and got her emergency Sam ham. She took the ham out of the sealed pouch and waved the contents of the bag in Sam's face. Sam's hand swiftly snatched the ham. "Hello, Sam Why are you in my house?" Carly grinned. Sam did it all the time so did not really care about the answer. "Went outside and realized how many stairs there were and came back. Oh yeah you need a new lock," She said with a mouth full of ham. Carly ran towards the door and saw that the chain had been snapped in half. "Sam," Carly said incredualsly. Sam shrugged obviously signaling she did not feel like talking. Sometimes she just did not understand her, but Carly was happy that at least Sam always stayed the same.

**Sam P.O.V**

Sam's voice didn't seem to work these days. The real reason why she didn't go home is once she walked out the door and looked at Freddies apartment door that was now repaired and had to stay just in cause Freddie himself would come out the door. Everytime she would go in Carlys apartment she would imagine Freddie with her. She could even smell his amazing spicey scent. Over the days and months; Sam began to miss Freddie so much it hurt. It was like a part of her was pulled away from her and a gaping hole was left there. She didn't why know why she cared so much but she couldn't help herself.

"_Although nothing could save him now he probably be dead in a ditch by now," _Sam thought. It hurt her so much just by the thought. She even felt tears ticke the corner of her eyes wanting to come down her face. She quickly buried her face in her hoodie sleeve. She let the fat tears trinkle down her check and she quickly wiped the off.

'Sam," Carly asked quizzically. Sam knew Carly had been worried about her because she had been acting strange. So Sam quickly brightened up and thought of something funny to say.

"I was thinking about how cheap this ham is BUY BETTER HAM," Sam smiled. She knew she wouldn't bring Carly into her confusing thoughts about Freddie.

Sam was supposed to be the strong one and she would continue to be.

_**The P.O.V we all know and love . . . Freddie**_

_**Freddie P.O.V**_

The car ride on the way to Seattle was in a eerie silence. This was something that always happened when he was around his father. They would fall into a scary quietness, acationally Freddie would glance at his father to see if he was mad it was best to stay clear of him when that happened. Freddies father, Jeff was a emotionless man. Jeff never showed any sentiment but there was one way to know he was mad. Jeff's lips would tighten, and his eyes would crinkle; that was the look Jeff was giving Freddie now. Thoughts raced in his mind, Freddie didn't know what he had done.

"Father," Freddie said in a quivering voice. Jeff swarved off the highway into a car resting spot. "We are to enter Seattle, town Readington. We are here to . . ." his voice trailed off. Freddie was confused. Jeff had always hated Seattle he said it was full of sinners and never to go there. Seattle had also been the place where Freddie had been raised. Freddie's mother Janine was a abusive drunk and one day hit Freddie so hard that he lost his memories. Well that's what he had been told by Jeff and Freddie every since hearing about his life before had been thankfull to his Father. No matter how rough he got Jeff was looking out for him. Although Freddie had been jumped around schools for two years and was getting tired of it, but he didn't dare speak of his uneasiness. As Jeff always said _Moaners should be condemned to die and if the government shall do nothing of it I will kill them with my own hands._

Jeff had been silent for ages until he finally spoke.

"I am here to take what is mine, and you will help me," Freddie felt a rush of exictment. Freddie was never aloud to do much on his Fathers missons fo peace but he was glad he was finally able to help.

"The mission will become clear soon enough, but here," Jeff handed Freddie a small enveloped filled with birthright papers and transcripts about his new identity.

"You will be Fredward Kress, exchange student from Canada. You will go to . . .," Once again his voice trailed off. Freddie could tell Jeff was nevous about the new plan.

"You will attend Ridgeway High. You will under no cercomstance tell these people who you are or about your memory loss. You will not screw up like last time," Jeff hissed out the words.

"O. . . o . . . ok," Freddie stuttered. Jeff's veins in his arms bulged and hes lips became thin tight; this is how he always got when he thought of Freddies first screw up. Freddie had revealed to much to one of his friends aand he blew their cover. Freddie winced while he remembered what happened that night.

_Flashback_

_It had only been a week since Freddie had started his first school, since Freddie had lost his memories. Jeff had told him all about his plans for _peace_, it all seemed a little ridiculous. Jeff had brought in a drunk man the night before, he said he would only try to show the man the ways of rightiousness but that didn't stop the mans terrified pleas and screams that night. What had the man done that was so wrong, so worthe of such a cruel punishment unknown to Freddie? Freddie had tried to ask his Father but his response to his question was a hard slap across his face. His words were_

"_You are STILL IGNORANT. ITS OBVIOUS THAT MAN HAD BEEN PARADING AROUND THE STREETS LIKE SOME WILD BOAR," Jeff's nostrils flared. Jeff suddenly sighed releasing his anger. He smirked at Freddie he reached out his hand and touched the now bruised cheek._

"_Im sorry, O how could you have known forgive me; for my ignorance had blinded my eyes," Jeff gave Freddie a smile that warmed his heart. Freddie knew he didn't mean it, he was just trying to protect him. Still Freddie had then on knew not to question Jeff's work. Although as the weeks past and through the night the were different screams of terror and pleas for there life, Freddie started to disbelieve Jeff's mission for _peace_. Freddie had made a new friend named Rachel at his school, she was so nice and considerate Freddie knew she would understand his doubts. So after telling her the truth she had had a urge to come to his house and see for herself. Freddie ,like the idiot he was, agreed. He and Rachel went to his house one afternoon to see the basement. This was the basement his Father forbade him to go into, his torture chamber, that's how Freddie saw it._

_They went down the creepy stairs Freddie gagged at the sight. Dried blood covered the entire room. There were bloody knifes on the creepy table. Rachel let out a terrified scream. There was a large table with leather restraints for your arms and legs. The most horrifying thing was that there was still a small pool of blood staining the wooden cover top. Then there was a loud slam. The door Freddie thought. He immediatly thought about Rachel. "Rachel," Freddie whispered to her, but it was to late. Freddies father had appeared at the door way . . . furious. _

"_Intruder," He yelled. He grabbed Rachels arm. She yelped in pain. Freddie threw himself at his father. "Rachel run," Rachel sprinted up the stairs and looked down at Freddie while he wrestled Jeff. "Go," He screamed again. She then sprinted out of sight. He heard the door give a loud slam. He then realeased his father from his hold. His arm veins bluged, his lips almost nonexistent. His eyes crinkled inspecting me trying to look into my mind. He tightly grabbed his arm. He led Freddie to the blood drenched table. "Take your clothes off," He mumbled. Freddie looked at him quizzecially. _

"_Now," Freddie immediately began to strip down to his underwear. Jeff looked him straight in the eye. "On the table," He commanded. Freddie looked at the table filled with blood and all he could think about were the germs. Jeff pushed Freddie on to the table with immense force and strapped him to the table. He eyed Freddie curiously from top to bottom. Freddie wished he could cover himself with his hands, to protect himself but he couldn't. Jeff got out a long leather whip. Freddie gulped._

"_No, Please I am your son," Freddie pleaded but Jeff disregarded him. He took the whip and pelted it him repeatedly at Freddie. Freddie let out a cry. He looked down at himself a long gashes lined down his bare chest. Jeffs father put the whip away, Freddie let out a cried out in relief. Jeff then got the thick butchers knife out. _

"_Now it's time for the punishment to begin." Jeff gave a sickening smile._

_End Flashback:_

He stop thinking about the sickening memory although it was not the last time. Freddie sighed he would have to think about the present no matter how much it would probably hurt. Jeff himself must have been thinking of the memory also because he was even more mad. Jeff punched Freddie right in the jaw. He grabbed Freddie by the shirt and pulled him close.

"You better not mess this up, or you may get a _punishment," _He hissed out the last word.

_**-A/N This was a hard chapter to write, I still don't like it but plzz still review. **_

_**REMINDERS: FREDDIE HAS LOST HIS MEMORY. Throughout the story he will get it back but for now he doesn't remember sam or carly! **_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Freddie's P.O.V**_

It was here again like a ghost haunting, taunting him. It was a never-ending nightmare, it was the plea's, and the screams of his fathers victims. Although one plea always stood out the most, one scream of a woman He can't seem to remember. It was like an echo in his mind. It pounded in his head screaming almost like it was there in the his room with him. Although Freddie was sitting on his bed imagining life . . . if it would end. Who would care enough to even go to his funeral, to put garden-fresh cut flowers on his freshly dug grave. Who would care enough? No one, cause everyone he met over the past two years he had helped his father con them or . . . kill. Not directly but it was as though Freddie just put them on Jeff's plate as Jeff devoured his next victim. No one even knew his identity except Rachel. Rachel who probably hated him for putting her in danger. He hated himself for it two. He was filth but he still always wondered if his life was different. If he had friends who cared who would put the flowers on his grave. Although Freddie couldn't think, the screaming had started up again. O God he was crazy. Freddie reached for his IPear touch and randonmly slected a song. He smiled blissfully, once the music started. It was uncanny how this song represented how he felt at the time. He was also happy at the fact that once the music started the screaming sub-sided.

You disappear with all your good intentions  
And all I am is all I could not mention  
Like who will bring me flowers when it's over  
And who will give me comfort when it's cold  
She took a plane to somewhere out in space  
To start a life and maybe change the world  
See I never meant for you to have to crawl  
No I never meant to let you go at all  
Don't ever say goodbye  
See my head aches from all this thinkin'  
Feels like a ship God, God knows I'm sinkin'  
Wonder what you do and where it is you stay  
These questions like a whirlwind, they carry me away  
Who will bring me flowers when it's over  
And who will give me comfort when itâ€™s cold  
Who will I belong to when the day just won't give in  
And who will tell me how it ends and how it all begins  
Don't ever say goodbye  
I'm only human  
I'm only human  
I'm only human

A/N_**this is soo becoming a song fiction but who cares! Thanks to rocklife13 for the song u DO ROCK!**_

After a few depressing songs Freddie finally decided he needed more songs. Freddie turned off his IPear and threw it on the bed. Freddie inspected his new room. It was large installed with shelves and his own bathroom! Freddie never always got such luxary's. Freddie thought though the place seemed familier; like an old friend. Freddie loved the new apartment. It was so big. Freddie smiled, they had just moved into the new apartment, it had took less than 30 minutes to unpack. They always traveled light, just incase of any emergency moves. Freddie grabbed his IPear again and decided to walk around. He grabbed a over-sized hooddie whose hood covered his entire face. As he reached for the door he heard voices outside his apartment.

"Carly, I want to go into the apartment," said the mysterious voice it struck his mind like a bullet through the almost seemed to wake him up from the haze he had been in for so long.

"No Sam," said a more high-pitched voice. Freddie gasped, his heart seemed to increase in speed. Maybe he was recovering his memery, yet just as fast as the feeling came it it left. Freddie determined to feel like that again looked through the peep hole. He couldn't see well he only manged to make out to female blobs. The blond one spoke ,"Look Carly I know your over . . . his death alrady but Im not but I think going in there for myself will help me get over it."

"Sam," The brown blob spoke, "You could get arrested if theres a alarm."

"It wouldn't be the first time," She started towards the door. Freddie had just realize they were talking about his apartment, the blond one had already started to pick the lock. Freddie gasped silently he looked around the room. His father was drunkly sprawled on the couch and his _punishment _tools laid openly on the table. Freddie put the hood over his face and closed the light. He waited until the room was pitch black to open the door. The oversized hoodie was white and was made with a material so he could see their face but they couldn't see his.

"Intruder, go away at once," Freddie screamed used a fake imitation of his Father, which was scary enough to scare anyone but the blond one barely flinched. Freddie was amazed just how pretty she was. She had long curly blond hair, with amazing blue eyes.

"Who are you and why are you in this apartment?" The girl with the blonde hair scolded. She lookd like she really hated me. . . he just wanted to know why.

"I live here," His voice returning to normal.

"You can't," her voice cracked.

"This is Freddie's apartment, GO AWAY," She screamed. How did she know his name and what was she yapping about.

"What the . . .," Her hand grabbed his hoodie, touching his face. He hands felt clammy and . . . sticky. He hand smelled like some type of ham. It was gross he could almost feel the unknown germs creep on hs face. Freddie than freaked out. "GET OFF," he screamed he pushed her to the ground and was exposed to the light. The door slammed behind him. There was no time. He couldn't think. He sa the apartment door in front of him wide open to Freddie charged into the girl's apartment his hoodie flying off in the process. He reached there sink and scrubbed his face red.

The two girls stood the staring at him agaped. He saw his hoodie on the floor. He must have token it off. His face, they could see his face. He quickly gathered his things and ran to his apartment. And slammed the door. They saw his real eyes and his face oh no oh no. He hated himself. He ran to the bathroom and picked up his soap, the only thing he aloud to be scented was peach. He inhaled the scent and it calmed him down. He than dared himself to look in the mirror. His eyes were light brown so light they almost looked white. They used to be dark brown until another punishment. His white eys trailed down to his large scar started on his neck and seemed to disapeer into his shirt. The memory was so clear of how it happened:

_Flashback:_

_It was Saturday finally Freddie thought to himself. He didn't have to pretend at the moment he was just Freddie __**Read. **__There was no façade. Freddie was relieved. Jeff was always out on Satudays. Freddie didn't know why but he certainatly didn't have a urge to ask. Freddie thought of it as a break from everything. Freddie trying to relaxs in his big comfy bed was immeadiatly interrupted by his father. _

"_Get up," Jeff said with ansiouxness in his voice, "We have to make a quick exit." Freddie jolted out of his bed. This was a code used between the father and son when they had to leave. Freddie liked it here though, he had so many new friends including . . . Rachel. Just yesterday Fredddie had his first punishment and something told him that it wouldn't be the last. Although Freddie quickly decided it was better not to face Rachel on Monday. To see her traumatized and disgusted face glare at him accusingly was not something he could handle. Freddie wanted his memory of her to remain the same. Her bright red hair glisten in the sun and her bright green eye's always laughing on some inside joke. He would remember her as the girl who cared, not the girl who would most certainly despise him on Monday. _

_Freddie got up and walked across the room shoveling his very few pairs of cloths in a big duffel bag. His body ached screaming at him to rest but he kept going. Freddie's punishment left him sore with each aganizing step he felt his torso burn from the pain of wounds reopening. Freddie soon got all is stuff in his fathers huge pick-up truck. _

"_Father may I look around," Freddie pleaded. Jeff was stuffing his_ equipment_ in a duffel bag forcing it in the over stuffed truck. _

"_Well at the looks of it I won't be able to leave for a while so go ahead but you better be back in 10 minutes," He hissed out the last part like a snake warning it's prey. _

"_Okay," Freddie raced to the beach. Jeff had been luckyto find an apartment right in front of a beach! Freddie stood on the rock made cliff that stood only 6 feet off the sandy beach. There were sharp pointed rocks at the end of the fall and salt water caressed the bottom of the the jagged rocks. Freddie didn't feel like going on the sandy mesa so he decided to look at the sceneory. Freddie looked at the sight he had grown so accustomed to over the past month. Since it was Decemeber the once light blue sea had turned a menacing black. The morning sun hid behind a blanket of dark clouds and fog invaded to beach almost seeming to choke him. Although the scene was depressing Freddie loved it. It was like his emotions were displayed in nature, it understood him like nobody did . . . not even Rachel._

_Freddie watched as the sun slowly rised up into its natural place up high. It shone down on him telling him to face the dangers that lie in his future. It was like saying goodbye to a friend. Although it was the same sun that rose on the earth on each state the one here shined more brightly. Here it almost caressed him with it's wormth. It shueds away the dark clouds, protecting him from there cold harshness. It was like a mother. A mother he would never have but he had felt so much love from the sun. Freddie smiled happy for the first time in such a long time. This happiness left as quickly as it came. _

"_It's been hours, Ive been searching all over for you," Freddies father screamed. "YOU IMBOSAL YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN US CAUGHT," Jeff's voice raised. Freddie backed away as far as he could stepping on the edge of the cliff. "I lost track of time sorry," Freddie mumbled, he messed up this time. _

"_There are NO mistakes in this world,' Jeff now whispered menancing eyeing him. "It's ok I will forgive you but we all have consequences." Jeffs arms places firmly gripping on his shoulders and . . . pushed. _

_Freddie fell face first toward the jagged rocks. It was a short fall but time seemed to slow and he could almost feel the excitement rise in his stomach. It would be over the pain the lies the deceit. He smiled face down as he came in collision with the rocks._

_Flashback done_

It didn't end. He lived to see the next day and Freddie couldn't have been more sad. He knew if it ended there he wouldn't have to take the pain. People say that when life gets tough that it'll get better but it didn't for Freddie. Freddie constantly waited for that way out. He looked for that door that God would open for him but it never came. Freddie could'nt find the way out because there wasn't one. The only way he could get out his crappy life it he would make a exit way. Somehow Freddie knew tht would be the way it would end.

_**If you didn't get the metaphor at the end he was talking about suicide. I know not much happened but I can't have action in every chapter. Review!**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Hello I'm sorry! This is just a explain chapter READ. In the lat chapter I didn't specify why exactly he has light brown eyes. Also just to tell you I mean light you know how people who are blind have those pretty brown eye well like that but he can see. My original version is that he IS blind but I thought I really wasn't going to be able to capture what it truly means to be blind sooo, yes. **_

The docter said he was lucky to be alive and to have his sight.

From the rough rocks Freddie had a long scar, starting from his neckline ending at his bellebutton. The water at the bottom had had a mysterious liquid to it that had made him lose some pigments in his eye. When people ask how he had fall he says, "I fell" Jeff would make up some story about some significient save that he swooped up and carried him to the docters. The truth was Jeff was a jackass. He had done it purposely injuring his son but Freddie had been late. Maybe Freddie deserved it? I mean Freddie was told what time to come but he had sat there gazing at some sun. Yes it was his fault. Jeff was right he had to be punished.

_**Like I said explaining chapter, Also I know all that science stuff maybe wrong but go along with it. Oh and please don't be , mad at Freddie for defending that sociopath. I mean he has no one to realy on and no one ever told him other wise. Yes Freddie does get more common sence later on.**_

_**Oh and There will be flshbacks a lot when it comes to Freddie, but always read them don't skip them or you will be so confused. **_

_**Review more only got like three **_

_**REVIEW OR BE BUM PIES!**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**I am going to make this authors note short. The last chapter was not a real chapter I was merely explaining chapter to inform you how he got such light eyes. ENJOY.**_

Sam P.O.V

I could not forget him ever since yesterday he kept reappearing in my thoughts. He looked so much like Freddie it was eerie but it could not have been him. This boy was much taller and his features more defined. He also had an aura about him that made him seem that he is experienced more than an average teenager should. His eyes said it to. They were almost hypnotizing but it was not Freddie. No boy could ever be or replace Freddie. Sam once again shooed away her thoughts of the mysterious boy and Freddie. Sam finally was able to pay attention to Ms. Briggs. Sam was mad that Ms. Briggs had followed her into high school. It was annoying enough that she had been in her middle school but now this. She would have to spend the next 3 years listening to that shrew.

"You dumb nugget hater," Sam said a bit to louder than wanted.

"I heard that," Ms. Briggs had been walking past her desk, she leaned in to Sam staring right at her, "You little ingrate, detention," She snarled.

"Ms. Briggs," A sharp tone scolded. In the corner of Sam's eye, she saw Mr. Cooper. Mr. Cooper was the principal of the high school. He always wore a sharp suit with a bright red tie. It was as if he had no other tie, it was weird. He was only in his 20's but he was creepy. He always gave students these lingering looks, he was freaking creepy but he was an ok principal not as good as Principal Franklin was.

"You don't talk to students like that, and this is the last time I will tell you that or this will be this will be the last time you ever teach high school," Mr. Cooper scolded, "Any who," He clapped his hands, his face grinned widely, "We have a new student today. His name is Fredward Kress an exchange student from Canada be nice children and Ms. Briggs," He shot Ms. Briggs a look, patted the white hooded figure on the back, and walked out of the room. Ms. Briggs cautiously backed away from Sam and headed towards the new student. Sam was barely paying attention to the dirty look that Ms. Briggs shot her. She looked at the hooded figure, could that be Freddie. Maybe he just had a different last name; maybe he was on the run looking for Sam trying to bring the old ICarly gang back together, maybe Freddie was alive. Sam's heart was on overdrive. She looked at the back of the classroom where Carly sat and gave her a look. She had the same hopeful look on. Sam looked at the desk next to her, which was the only empty desk in class. He would sit next to her. Sam immediately perked up.

"Why do you have that damn hood on get that off in the building," She pulled the large white hood that covered the tall figures face. Sam stood in her desk and slammed her hands on her desk making everyone stare at her. "It's you," She said. It was the boy from the apartment. He was . . . cute. He looked panicked his eyes darted all over the room but now instead on the transparent brown eyes she had dreamed about they were brown. They were regular brown eyes that now stared her down, challenging her.

Ms. Briggs rolled her eyes. She shoved the boy towards Sam. "Sit in the seat already."

He cautiously looked at me. He then hesitantly sat in his seat. Sam looked in amazement. He is eyes were a plain boring brown met they stared at me in total resentment. Sam shrank back in her seat. This obviously was not Freddie, but he had his name and he somewhat looks like him. There was no way to really know but if it were, there would be a different reaction. I mean it could not be Freddie. Sam left her thoughts behind finally. She needed to give Freddie up. Freddie is dead. Sam scolded herself. She would accept this person as a different being.

She would not replace Freddie with this . . . doppelganger. Sam turned and looked at the boy. She gave him a smile or something she thought was a smile. Sam suddenly was embarrassed; he probably thought that 'smile' was a grimace.

The boy just stared at her with an intense stare that gave her a chill. He then gave her a toothy smile, or what she thought was a smile anyway. He turned his head and started paid attention to Ms. Briggs. Sam also tried to pay attention but her focus was always brought back to him. He sat here his eyes steadily moved across the chalkboard. He intensely immersed himself into the lesson. He was just like Freddie. Sam mentally scolded herself again for comparing him to Freddie.

Lunchtime – an hour later

It was lunch already. It turns out the boy was in every one of her classes. It was exhausting having to always having to rip herself from looking at the boy. Sam was sitting at her regular table with Carly, Gibby, Tasha, and that weird Australian kid who likes me. We all chatted our usual randomness but Sam's thoughts always returned to the boy. She searched the small packed room with her eyes, she saw him. He sat in the back in a dimly lighted corner were the weirdo's sit. "I'll be right back," She said to the group. She ran to the corner where the boy was. She sighed nervously and talked.

"Look I know you're new but this is where the poetry readers sit. You know the ones that think there deep but really just write depressing poetry filled with crappy metaphors. Come with me you should come to my table." Sam gave him a smile. She was at least happy that she was acting normal around him. "Hum well I don't know you well," It almost hut her when he said that. A Goth girl who was sitting next to them talking to her small group suddenly stood up. "I will read my poem now," Her voice droned on, "It's called, My Life's a Miserable Hole filled with Deceit," She then began her poem. One minute into the poem Sam and the boy were both trying to muffle their laughter. It was terrible. She shot us a menacing look. "Sure, let's go," he said. They finally reached the table they busted out laughing. Everyone stared at them with quizzical expressions.

"Hey," Sam said realizing how strange they must have looked, "This is the new kid, I thought we should be nice so I invited him here. Is that ok?"

"Sure," Carly said, everyone nodded their head in agreement. They all stared at him. They all thought the same thing. He looked like Freddie.

"Guy's this is . . .," Sam's voice trailed off, what should she call the boy with Freddie's name. Did she give him a nickname? The boy must have notice her discomfort.

"Fredward call me Fred though I swear I don't know what my mom was thinking when she named me," Fred laughed trying to break the nervous tension.

"Guy's look I know what you're thinking this is not Freddie. I want him back as much as you but we shouldn't make him uncomfortable," Everyone nodded in agreement and went on with their conversations every now and then they would sneak a peek at Fred. Fred looked confused but let the subject drop.

This was a sign Sam has to let go of the past . . . let go of Freddie. Now she had a new friend. Sam knew she promised to herself not to replace the doppelganger with Freddie but she knew she would end up doing it. The way to get over Freddie is to replace him and that is what she is going to do.

_**I'm sad I didn't get Freddie in there but I had to have Sam's feelings about Fred out in the open. Also You can say that Freddie has two lives ok. His dad calls him Fred and everyone from his new life. Im sorry if I made a mistake.**_

_**Thx Review.**_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Tuesday 5:00 pm**_

_**Freddie P.O.V**_

I will never be like one of them. I will never be normal. I cannot do it; it is as if my body is not able to. I have always thought about what I want to say and do but never do it. I have always been almost a completely different person on the outside. It was if I am watching my body move and talk, but it is not me it is like a ghost. It was possessing me making me something I am not it was sickening and it was my own father.

My heart always ached when someone asked me a personal question why, because it is just another pile of lies stacking in my brain. I do not even bother to memorize them anymore.

Although this time, it is different. I feel myself being more me, whatever that is. These people they do something to me. They make me goofier; they make me act so different it is unusual. I do not put on an act around them.

Moreover, is that a good thing . . . no its not. I do not know the reason for opening up to these people but it will be all the harder for me. If I leave . . . I mean when I leave it is going to be harder for all of us.

The one reason why I do want to keep them as friends is for this reason. They are not many people in this world that know the real me. When I die, when my time in the world is done for me, I want friends to leave flowers on my grave. I need to know who are the people whose memories of me will be real. That it will not be some façade that I imprinted in their brains. Freddie sighed. He knew there was no reason to linger on these depressing thoughts. He needed to move forward, look to the future, but Freddie found that the future was as bleak and as pointless as the present and his unidentified past. So why did he have to continue it?

Freddie once again groaned. Freddie is wondering thoughts sometimes about his life sometimes brought him to this. His thoughts always brought him to a dark place in his mind. A place he always tries to avoid.

He knew that the world is a sick place. He knew the there were children with nothing, he knew some children starved but here is the thing his life was dreadful. He would trade his life for anyone's.

Freddie finally had enough. He could not stand it anymore, the depressing thoughts. Freddie was sitting on his bed, the quiet surrounding him; which is what brought the depressing thoughts. The silence always made him reminisce in the past sometimes; he would sink so deep in to the terrifying thought's; sometimes it felt as though he would never get out.

Although Freddie thought, the present is the worst. It was like a nightmare during the day. Petrifying it really was. At night, was the worst because he would be left alone with the silence; trapped with his thoughts. Freddie needed to leave. He needed to walk away from the thoughts, from everything. He would for now just leave problems his unsolved. Freddie got up from his bed. He walked out of his room. He then saw his father once again drunk flat out on the floor. Freddie snickered for someone who talked about change about world peace he sure, the hell drank a lot. Freddie stepped over his father and walked to the door. He looked at his phone to check the time 5:30. Freddie was surprised how early it was. He wondered what Carly and Sam were doing.

Freddie smiled at the thought of the two. Carly was so sweet. She was caring and nice; he only got that impression from today! Although Sam was something else, she was an as some people say _a force of nature. _She was reckless and a bit demented! However, there was something else there. Freddie could not tell what it was but he was determined to find out.

Freddie walked out of his dim apartment into the brightly lit hallway. He walked to Carly's apartment door and knocked.

"Come in," A male voice called. Freddie felt a strange feeling of déjà vu. He felt excited again, for some reason Freddie knew his past was tied up in that apartment. He swaggered inside a strange confidence filled him.

"Hello, wow Carly was right you do remind me of . . ." his voice sadly trailed off, he looked deep in thought as he inspected me head to toe, "YOU WANT PIE."

He screamed loudly pointing to a freshly baked pie.

"No Thank you," Freddie replied. He knew Carly said he was odd but this dude was nuts. Freddie stood there and observed Carly's brother as if he was a specimen not known to man. Spencer was currently shoveling pie down his throat. Freddie giggles. He looked around the room it was bright and colorful filled with strange sculptures. A strange banana shaped couch sat in the middle of the room. It struck a feeling of remembrance. The feeling rushed through him. Just like all the other feelings they came as fast as they left.

"Where's Carly," Freddie finally said.

"Oh," The man looked up from his pie. His face was smeared with cherry filling. His eyes wide and frantic. Freddie tried to muffle a laugh.

"She's upstairs getting ready, you can go up there first door on the left," Freddie nodded. Freddie wondered what she was getting ready for.

Freddie reached the clear door, he gasped. Inside was a large room filled with amazing color. There was a cart filled with technology, beside it Gibby was fiddling around with a small lightweight camera.

The sight of the technology brightened Freddie's day. Technology was important to Freddie. It meant the world to him. Although Jeff despised it he said, "The route of evil is fond on the web," Freddie thought it was retarded but his father was always right. Sarcasm implied. Freddie went inside the room. Excitement practically bursted through Freddie enveloping him. The room gave him so much joy.

"Hey Fred," Carly pepped. She was wearing a cowgirl girl outfit. Sam in the corner of the room twirled at the sound of his name. She was wearing a cowboy outfit; with a large fake mustache propped up on her face. Her hair was tucked inside an over-sized cowboy hat. She gasped at the sight of him. She tore off the fake mustache and ran up to him.

"Fred what the hike you doing here," Her voice dripping with annoyance but her eyes gleamed with excitement. She gave him a weird look. She eyed him weirdly inspecting his face.

"I ugh needed to get out, since I live next door," Freddie saw Sam's face drop at the mention of his apartment. Who was so important that lived there to make it such a bad memory, "thought I'd drop in."

"Awesome, we were about to shoot ICarly you can sit in, "Carly said. She turned around in front of Sam and snatched the mustache out of her hand; then plastered it firmly above her lip. When she turned around, she looked surprise to but quickly tried to cover it up by giggling as if someone had made a joke.

"Uh what's ICarly," Sam and Carly stopped in their tracks and looked him straight in the eye. Even Gibby stopped fiddling with the camera to stare at him.

"What," Freddie finally said out of annoyance.

"You've never heard of ICarly?" Carly looked at him incredulously, "Were a freaking web show. How do you not know us? We've been to Japan; have over 1 million views; and we've been to web icon twice."

"Yeah you weirdo have you lived under a rock," Sam screamed.

"You could say that," Freddie attempted to calmly explain, "My dad hates computer never lets me use one but I went for the AV club behind his back. I am good at computers but we really did not get that much good websites. Most of them were blocked." All of them nodded in understanding but gave him a few side looks.

"Ugh," Gibby groaned in frustration and dropped the camera on the cart. The camera gave a slight _thud. _Freddie's heart ached at the mistreatment of the equipment.

"Gibster," Freddie said cautiously, "What's wrong?" Freddie said while eyeing the high-tech equipment.

"I don't know how to use this stuff," Gibby turned towards Carly and Sam, "Sorry guys I don't know this stuff."

"Gibby what the hell," Sam said angrily stepping forward, "We have no one else just freaking try!"

"I did."

"Well not hard enough," Sam was now in the position of a sumo wrestler preparing to attack.

"Sam," Gibby cautiously stepped back, "I'm sorry." Sam screamed loudly charging towards Gibby. Gibby ran out the clear door and closed it behind him. Behind the door, he then took his shirt off and ran screaming down the stairs.

"Sam," Carly screamed at Sam who was now lying on the floor out of exhaustion, "What are we going to do? We have no one to do the camera. We would have Anthony if you had not have broken him."

"Look," She said her head lolling towards Carly. Her mustache falling off and her hair tumbled out of her hat . . . she looked cute.

"I did not break him. I just broke his arm," Freddie accusingly glared at her, "What I needed money for lunch."

Freddie shakes his head disapprovingly. "Sam," Carly said she sat down on a chair, "what are we going to do."

Freddie felt sorry for them. Freddie sighed and walked to the cart. He looked at the computer, there website was flashed at him. In the middle of the page, Sam and Carly were sitting on the ground laughing at a bra that hung from a wire. What kind of show was this?

Freddie dismissed the thought. It did not matter his new . . . friends needed him. He quickly scanned the server to make sure everything was up to date. He made a few server updates until he was interrupted.

"Whatcha doing, are you really going to help us?" Sam whispered in his ear. His body shuddered at the sound of her voice. He was comforted by it; it was as it eased his tenseness.

"Y. . . Y . . . Yes I . . . I . . . I am ugh fixing you server. Your computer needed like 3 updates," He then quickly dashed around Sam reaching for the camera. When he picked it up, he smiled. He loved the lightweight feel to it. It seems to bring him joy. Everything he touched in this apartment brought him joy, but he has own luxurious apartment brought him discomfort. He hated it seemed to bring a feeling of regret; melancholy. Freddie did not know that coming to Seattle were going to arise such feelings. Freddie may after all find out his past but here is the thing did he even want to remember?

"Come on," Sam screeched, snapping him out of his trance. Sam and Carly both were fully dressed in their costumes waiting for him.

He clicked the lab top a few times and ran towards them.

"5

4

3

2" He then pointed towards them to start the show but they just stared at him, a gapped. Their eyes were wide like saucers staring at him.

"Guy's I know I'm pretty, but can we start the show," Freddie smirked; he wondered what the hike is wrong with these girls?

"Oh ugh, hi I'm a Sam," Sam pointed to herself. Her smile wide and goofy.

"I'm a Carly," She sweetly smiled at the camera.

"And that is our new tech producer, Freddi – I mean Fred," Sam screamed, she had a sorrowful expression on her face.

"Show 'em your face nerd boy."

"Sam," Carly scolded. Freddie felt a bit uncomfortable showing his face on the internet but slowly turned the camera anyway. Then thoughts raced in his head, Freddie remembered removing his contacts when he got home. Did he remember to put them on? He also had taken of his cover-up to hide his scar that started at his chin and ended at his navel. Did he re-apply that? Were there bruises on his face from when his dad had punched him a yesterday?

Before he could even think about it more the camera, face him completely. He knew he did not have his contacts on or cover up. That is why Sam had given him weird looks when he came in. he was exposed on the internet. There was nothing to hide behind and even though he was scared out of his mind, it was . . . freeing. It gave him a feeling of control.

"Hello, My names Fred and well I guess I am the new technology producer," He gave a toothy grin or what he could manage and turned the camera back.

"We call it tech nerd," Sam said, her smile was radiant.

"Sam," Carly said laughing along.

20 minutes later

"That's all the time we have now. So everyone remember," Sam leaned into the camera far in. "If you see Justin Bieber hit him with a stick," Sam said while laughed.

"No," Carly said while pushing Sam out of the cameras view, "You see that hunk of white chocolate, you give him my number," She then winked into the camera. Freddie laughed. He then turned off the show.

"And were out," Freddie smiled. This was fun. They were goofy and crazy. The show was so funny; it was a bit overwhelming. The girls were now sitting on a chair drinking water; discussing the success of the show.

Carly then suggested watching a movie. They all then sat down on comfortable beanbag chairs and watched Vampires Suck.

After the movies over

Freddie was still on his side from laughing so hard. Freddie may have had amnesia but still knew of twilight. Freddie never found the appeal of it. He also did not know why these two people liked Belle so much she is kind of plain; depressing. I found no appeal; Vampire Sucks said all the things Freddie hated about the books and movies . . . in a much more HILARIOES way. Freddie checked his phone it was already 8:30. Freddie stood up quickly. He mumbled his goodbye and ran out the room; and out the apartment.

Sam's P.O.V

After watching that amazing movie, Freddie got up and left. What was that about? He looked petrified. After he looked at his phone, did he get a bad text message? Maybe it was his friend or his . . . girlfriend. Whatever Sam did not care but she was itching to find out. She made up some excuse, left the apartment, and stood in front of Freddie's door. She could do it all, she had to do knock. Before her hand had even reached the door, she heard a scream. A loud petrified scream that scared Sam to her soul. The scariest part was it sounded like _Fred._

_**Hello thank you for reading. OMG 5 pages on word Holy CRUDMONKEYS**_

_**I want you to be appreciative**_

_**I want more than 3 reviews, last time that was all I got**_

_**YOU SHOULD SINCE THIS SATURDAYS MY BIRTHDAY!**_

_**December people rock!**_

_**P.S. – sorri if I got a bit vague at the end I just really wanted to get it out**_

_**p.p.s- sorri if it got depressing in the beginning**_

_**ppps- REVIEW**_


	10. Chapter 10

**Freddie P.O.V**

**Wednesday 2:00 a.m.**

He just sat there.

All night, he did not even lie down. He just sat there staring into his pitch-black surroundings. The only lights came from the window, a thin stream of light flooding in the room.

He did not think. He just sat.

He tried to forget the past, or of what he could remember of it. All he knew was that he would not mess up anymore. This day on, he would be the perfect son. He would obey, lately he had been having some thoughts against his father, and this was ignorant. How could he turn against the one person who has always tried to look after him? He would be loyal. He would help his father on his mission for that are what good sons do.

Freddie got up from the uncomfortable wooden chair he had sat in for hours. He stretched his back and went to his bed. He lay down on his comfortable bed. He sunk in the bed and snuggled in as it cushioned around him. The sheets on his bed were new, pure white, now were stained with bright red blood. Freddie lifted his arm. From this angle in the room the moon light streamed on his hand. A long gash swirled around his hand, throbbing to a steady beat. The song unknown and each note pained him. Blood still glistened on his hand. Freddie let the hand drop to the snow-white sheets, letting it blood splatter on the sheets. It almost created an art of some sort; he did not bother to clean up the nasty cut. His mind was restless. He just sank into the bed. The cut drained him of the tension somehow. It released his pent up energy. He was afraid if he cleaned, it up he would become tense again.

He then started to drift off into sleep. Then it happened it was like a wave crashing down on him. The voices were back again. Freddie clasped his hands on his ears trying to block out the sound.

Of course, this did not work since the voices were in his head. The screams of his father's victims once again came to haunt him. Once again, one women's voice stood out the loudest. Although this time she said something, which she never had before, "Beware the man, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry," The words repeated in his brain.

Freddie shrieked in frustration. Freddie then got up and ran to his drawer. In the last drawer was a leather case. He picked it up. The screaming seemed to get louder. Freddie knew what he had to do. Freddie dumped the contents of the leather bag onto his bed. Which were a small handkerchiefs, a silver clauddagh ring, and most important a small knife. The knife's hilt was made of smooth leather. On the leather was an engraved J. Freddie could not remember where he got it. He just remembered when he had first woken up in the hospital he found it clutched in his hand. When he had seen Jeff standing over him with an intrigued look on his face, Freddie just did not trust him. His black eyes looked at him the wrong way. His greased back hair and small round spectacles made Freddie at once distrust him. Therefore, from day one since Freddie had lost his memory he had hidden the knife from Jeff.

Freddie could not more like would not imagine the pain he would be in if Jeff found out Freddie had been keeping something from him. Freddie took the knife and brought it to his bicep. Freddie already started to wince before he had pressed the knife on his skin. Freddie did not want to do it but the voices would not stop if he did not. As Freddie made the small slit in his arm, the voices began to cease. Freddie dropped the knife on the bed and sank to the floor. He clasped his hands on his ears and waited impatiently for the creams to stop. Soon they just became a mere echo.

Freddie got up and dropped on his bed. Freddie for that first time that night let his emotions out. Small little tears leaked out the corner of his eyes.

Why did this have to happen to him? Freddie did not know what kind of person he was before the accident but he knew he was not _that _person. He did not want to be the person to cope with their life had to well . . . cut. That was not what he was doing. He was not _cutting _it was just a way to stop the screaming.

The more he repeated that sentence the more he disbelieved himself. He could not admit it to himself. He would not.

Why did this have to be his life? The tears started to come quicker staining his pillow. Then he started to sob. Then he just started to fade away into the darkness. He only hoped that dreams would not intrude on his sleep. Moreover, of course because of amazing luck . . . he had a complete _nightmare._

_He stood in the old Elmer Street Park. He always laughed at the horrible name of the park. They had only opened it last year to his surprise. Why they would name a park, those children to play on, after a horry movie, he did not know_

_Freddie could see himself sitting on the undersized swinging seat. Freddie himself was almost floating in the air. He was like the soft breeze. Although he was immobilized, standing still Freddie knew what was to come. He wanted to run away from the memory. He tried to lock this memory in a vault away from his mind but it always seemed to recur. _

_He saw himself finally move. He stood up from the swing and walked towards a girl. His heart swelled with joy at the sight of her. He knew it was only a dream but it felt so real. Freddie could almost smell her sweet mango scent that always filled the air when she was present. In the dream, her hair shined abnormally bright and as well did her eyes._

"_Hello Fred," She tried to scrimmage a smile but it turned out to be more of a grimace. _

"_Hey," He was over-excited. He saw himself practically jumping up and down._

"_Fred I am happy to see you and thank you for coming all the way to Elmer Street Park," Freddie did notice that it was dark outside but only 5 o'clock._

"_Rachel I have to tell you something before you come see what's in my house tomorrow," Freddie said hopping he could muster the courage to tell her, "I know I told you what he does . . . but you can't come. Stop I know what you are going to say that it is going to be okay but it is not. What if you get hurt? What if he . . . finds you? What if," Freddie gulped not even wanting to think of it?_

"_Stop! I came here to give you this," She started to rummage through her knapsack until she pulled out a small sparkling object._

"_This is my claddagh ring. I want you to have it," she thrusted it into his hand. He held it up to the streetlight. The silver glistened brightly its heart was a shimmering sapphire. She wore the ring every day. _

"_My father gave this to me before he died. If the day does not go as planned I want you to know that fathers truly are loving people," She closed his hand around it, "I can not . . ."_

"_Yes you can," she gave him a reassuring smile; "This means a lot to me you better not lose it."_

"_See you at school" She then disappeared into the darkness away from the streetlight. Suddenly there was no park just Freddie shocked face starring at the beautiful claddagh under the streetlight. The dream faded away._

Freddie woke with a jolt. How could he have been so stupid to let her see his house? Freddie always thought it was probably the shimmer of the ring that hypnotized him into thinking this was a good idea.

Freddie could not afford to have mistaken like that happen again.

_**Thank you for reading sorry for being so short and boring holidays make me procrasanate. **_

_**This is just about his thoughts about his life basically and how he still feelis guilty about Rachel.**_

_**I know he seems hot and cold about his father but hes confused. **_

_**He sort of thinks he's the good guy then again resents him for mistreating Freddie.**_

_**Thank you! Review**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**Sam's P.O.V**_

_**Wednesday 9:00 a.m.**_

_**In School – Social Studies – Ms. Briggs class**_

Sam felt her eyes droop. All night she had been kept up by her thoughts about what she heard. Of course, there, was a reason he probably started watching a horror movie? Sam still could not convince herself. Sam did not see him in homeroom. What if he was hurt?

Sam's thoughts started to fade away as she finally out of exhaustion dropped on her desk.

_*She snored obnoxiously loud. Ms. Briggs annoyingly eyed Sam but she had a small pleasure in her heart knowing she could send her to the principal office for this. Ms. Briggs walked with a 12-inch ruler in her hand. The class watched anxiously, they knew what would happen. Ms. Briggs hit the ruler hard on Sam's knuckes.*_

Sam woke up with a jolt, her knuckles throbbing. Then she saw Ms. Briggs standing next to her desk snarling at her with a 12-inch ruler in her hand.

"What the What? Did you just hit me?" Sam screeched. Sam grabbed the ruler from her hand and slapped Ms. Briggs with the ruler across her face.

Ms. Briggs clutched the side of her face looking at Sam a gasped. Sam rolled her eyes she did not hit her that hard.

"This is the last straw, principles office NOW!" Ms. Briggs faces red from anger.

Sam snorted, "You said that last week," she rolled her eyes and grabbed her books. She was happy to get out of the classroom, maybe she would be sent home and she would get some sleep. Then again, her mother would have a fit better just talk her way out of this one.

She strolled towards the principal's office. Halfway there she realized it would be best to put her books in her locker and grab her cellphone that she left in her locker by accident.

When she reached her locker, she punched in her locker code and ripped it open. She frowned she missed her microwave she used to have. Although _some people _think, it is a 'fire hazard' . . . wimps. After rummaging around in her locket, she finally found her cellphone she put her books in her locker and started to walk towards the principle office.

When she reached the office she sat down on the plush chairs in the secretary's Ms. Humble office waiting to be called in. Then Fred walked in the door breathing hard his book bag draped over his shoulder. Sam got up quickly.

"Fred it is you," Sam said happy he was okay. She started to walk towards him then stopped suddenly. His hand was wrapped up in gaze she could see the blood seeping through.

"What happened to you," she ran towards and picked up his hand. He winced.

"Oh sorry," she instantly dropped his hand. He winced again.

Ugh, what is wrong with her?

"It's okay," He said, giving her a reassuring smile. He went up to the secretary, "I over slept sorry," she handed him a late slip, "Go straight to class." She popped her bubblegum obviously annoyed at Fred.

"Oh and you," she said snarling at me, "Ms. Briggs called me from her classroom phone. I know what you did go to the office right now."

"Whatever," if Ms. Humble cold have an attitude so could she. Before she walked in the office

Fred said, "What you do?"

"I slapped Ms. Briggs with a ruler." She said as she walked into the principal's office.

Mr. Cooper sat behind his desk. He looked at me curiously inspecting me. His glaze lingered far too long. Sam walked in leaving the door open sitting in one of the wooden chairs.

Mr. Cooper stood. To her surprise, he wore a different color tie it was more of a dull, dark red than usual. He was still creepy. He walked towards the door and closed it shut.

"Sam, Sam, Sam," He said.

"Mr. Cooper, Mr. Cooper, Mr. Cooper," Once again this man surprised her; he laughed at her attempted to mock him.

"Sam, you have to realize that," he walked towards her putting his hand on her shoulder, "life is no Nintendo game,"

"No, but that is a song,"

"You cannot continue to act like this."

"I won't suspend you Sam for I feel as though you would only disregard the punishment as a vacation," Sam smiled at the realisms of the decision, "But I will give 3 Saturday morning detentions," Sam groaned. She did not have a problem with Saturday detentions she usually caught up with her sleep but now a day Ms. Briggs lead Saturday detentions. Sam remembered when Ms. Humble did it. She would file her nails and ignore the children. She loved those days she would just sit and think or sleep . . . but mostly sleep. Although now with Ms. Briggs in charge, she could never get any peace and quiet.

"You will have them with me," He smiled as though he had done a great deed. Yet Sam found herself wishing for Ms. Briggs. Sam still could not help but notice that his hand still was on her. It lingered on his touch made her shiver with revulsion.

He gave her a smile and he leaned in close until he was close to her ear. He smelled like sterilized gloves.

"We will have so much fun," His hand now caressed her check.

"I think I have to go to class now," Sam said itching to get out of here.

His face rubbed against mine as he backed away. Soon his lips also rubbed against her check Sam began to breathe hard. He must have taken this the wrong way because he gave her a smile.

Sam quickly got out of her chair and tried to walk out the room but before she even reached the doorknob, Mr. Cooper pressed himself behind her. Once again, he leaned close; "Do not tell anyone Sam that would be bad," Sam gulped and ran out the room.

Sam ran out Ms. Humbles office. She headed straight to her locker. The hallways were empty. Sam just leaned against the cool metal and sank to the floor.

_What just happened here?_

_**Freddie P.O.V**_

_**After School – Carly's Apartment - Gibby; Carly; Sam; Fred**_

Everyone sat on big comfortable beanbag chairs. Freddie felt slightly uncomfortably. Since Gibby was here, they were a beanbag short so Carly suggested that she would share one with him. It was uncomfortable. She pressed up against him. No matter how he moved, she seemed to be against him.

He was not accustomed to being so close to people.

Soon he relaxed and untensed. He became more absorbed in the conversation. They were talking about how ugly Lewberts wart was until Freddie's bad luck struck again, as Sam said, "Hey how about we play Truth or Dare. We might be able to find out more about the mysterious," she pointed towards him in an over dramatic way, "FRED," she screamed.

Freddie was surprised she seemed upbeat all of a sudden. She was out of it all day. He wondered what happened to her.

Ugh, could he stop thinking about her right now? This was a dangerous situation. He had to get out of here. Then again, Jeff was still mad at him for yesterday. The thought of Freddie actually being with an irritated Jeff made him shiver.

He would just stay and lie.

"Ok," Carly said, Gibby agreed too. Freddie just nodded slightly nauseated.

"The guest of honor will go first, Fred Truth or Dare," Carly said. Freddie's heart was beating. He was nervous. In addition, Carly was uncomfortably close.

"Uh Dare," Freddie said as he inched away from Carly.

"Uh," Sam then got a mysterious smile, "I dare you to take off your contacts."

"Sam, that's not very fun plus He might have vision problems." Carly scolded.

"I have perfect vision," Freddie defended; oh crap why he said that.

"Then take em off," Sam said while getting threateningly close. Just so she would back away he plucked them out his eyes. He sighed in relief they were getting in the way.

This was not too bad. He did not reveal too much he had already mistakenly showed them his eyes. There was not much harm in this.

Sam smiled in a trance. She did not back away as he wanted she moved closer gazing in his eyes. Soon their noses were pretty much touching, "Sam," Freddie said nervously.

Sam broke out of her trance. She gasped.

"So . . . oo . . . ry," she said. Her cheeks grew a bright curly blonde hair fell on her face. She looked adorable. He felt himself falling into a trance.

"It's okay," he said getting flushed himself.

"Any who," Gibby said loudly. Gibby said trying to break the tension, "Whose turn is it now?"

Everyone looked at me in anticipation. Oh, he had to choose. He was about to pick Sam but too avoided any more awkward moments he went with the safe choice Carly.

"Carly Truth or Dare."

"Uh, Dare," She looked at him with excited expression. Freddie thought she would have Truth so he was not ready. Therefore, he went with a typical dare. "I dare you to go take this bean bag chair. . ." He picked up the beanbag chair they were sitting on and handed it to Carly. It must have been heavy for her but he did not care, "And hit your brother in the head with it," Freddie said, he then sat on the floor and crossed his legs. He should have done this before. The plush carpet comforted him.

"Why you want me to hurt Spencer, "She said while giggling under her breathe. That was her brother's name Spencer.

"No it will be funny just does it. Gibby help her," Carly and Gibby then both struggled to get the oversized beanbag chair out the door. Soon they were gone off to do that ridicules dare.

"That's a funny dare you made up. Good Work," Sam congratulated. It took a while before Freddie realized that he was alone with Sam. He suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"Why did you not want to go see it for yourself?"

"To lazy what about you?"

"Did not feel like it."

They sat in silence for a while. Freddie stared at the purple swirls carpet as though it would jump and eat him. Finally, he looked up and saw that Sam was looking at him.

"Ugh Sam," Freddie said quizzically.

She then got off the beanbag chair and crawled toward him. She gazed at him the whole time. When she was close, enough he realized that this time she was not looking at in his eyes but at his neck. She examined it. She then took her finger, licked it, and rubbed them against his neck. She was rubbing off his cover up for his scar but he did not care.

_Germs_

She licked her fingers, contaminated him with her disgusting filth.

He jumped back and grabbed for the water on the table. He poured it on him scrubbing his neck frantically.

"Freddie," Sam said worried. She touched his arm. She licked her right hand and now is touching me with her hand.

"EW,"Freddie screamed, "Get away!" Freddie now ripped off his shirt. He poured the water all over him trying to scrub away the filth.

_Bacteria_

_Germs_

_Filth_

_Contagious_

Those words repeated in his head like some echo.

Finally he suddenly felt okay as if it was all gone he had scrubbed away the germs. Freddie had used his jagged bitten nails to scrub his body so his skin was red.

When Freddie turned around, he saw Sam kneeling on the floor looking at his chest. Her eyes filled with tears. He looked down.

His arms were filled with scars and _cuts._ He had big whip lashes sprawled in his chest. Oh Crap, he grabbed his shirt on the floor. It disgusted his to put it back on but he had to.

"Fred . . . Wha . . . a. ... at the hell was that?"

He did not answer just stared at her.

"Do you cut yourself?" She said crying at the very word. She knew something was up. What was he supposed to do?

"Look," Freddie kneeled down on the floor and leaned in close, "You cannot tell anyone," Freddie pleaded.

"But Fred . . . I have to tell someone this cannot go on . . ." Her voice trailed off.

"You will tell no one," This time Freddie threatened. He held her shoulders tight. He leaned in closer until he was at her ear.

"Or I will _kill _you, "Freddie then got up and left.

Freddie walked downstairs. He found Gibby recording Carly as she beat Spencer with the beanbag chair. Freddie walked out and slammed the door. He walked to his apartment door.

His life was complete crap. How could he have said that to Sam? He had to keep his secret though. No matter what.

Then Freddie remembered that Jeff was out for the whole night. Freddie smiled at the thought of having the house to himself.

He opened the door and found his worst nightmare sitting on his couch. The red head got up and walked towards him, "Hello Fred."

_**Whoa! Drama as I said. I know it is short but whatever. **_

_**What is Rachel doing here? **_

_**How the hell she get in his house?**_

_**How will this turn out?**_

_**You will find out when I do!**_

_**REVIEW**_


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N: I am very excited with all the reviews I got. I wanted to say thank you. I now have 41 reviews!**_

_**So excited never thought that this would this popular**_

_**Please enjoy this chapter **_

_**p.s. I am starting with Sam's P.O.V just to make some people mad!**_

_**Disclaimer: I LOVE BRITISH PEOPLE. That has nothing to do with me not owning ICarly, but there you go. ***_

*/-

_**Sam's P.O.V**_

_**Freddie just left – Carly; Sam in the studios – Gibby also left**_

"Sam," Carly said. She plopped on the beanbag chairs, "Why did you scream at Gibby telling him to go home? He got really scared, I think he pee'd his pants," Carly said.

"You know it was funny," Sam forced out a giggle. All Sam could think about were the scars on his body. The longest scar started from his neck ended at his navel. The scars were long and thick. Did someone do that to him? Did he do that to himself?

The scariest thing was when he turned around to get his shirt on his back was carved letters.

It said Sinner written on his back. They were written large letters. It looked old. She only got a brief look.

She also could not help but notice his six- pack . . .

"I have to tell you something about Fred," Sam began, "Well I was looking at him then I noticed . . ."

Her voice trailed off. She suddenly remembered Fred is warning, _Do not tell anyone or I will kill you._

Sam felt he was not a person to mess with but what could she do? If Fred was doing this to himself, he _obviously _needs help. If someone else did this to him, he needed to be cared for.

Sam had to be sure before she could tell anyone _even_ Carly.

"I . . . Ugh . . . noticed that his eyes look _really _pretty," Sam blurted out.

"Ugh . . . I guess but did you really need to make Gibby cry just to say that?" Carly said while giggling.

"He does not need to know how I feel," Sam said incredulously. What Sam said was true he did have pretty eyes. . .

"Sam," Carly said cautiously," Do you like Fred?" Carly inspected her head to toe.

Sam looked at her incredulously.

_**Freddie's P.O.V**_

_**His apartment – Rachel; Freddie**_

Freddie's eyes were felt as though they were glued shut. He felt the comfort of his bed, his sheets wrapped around him. He took a deep breath in, it was just a dream. A horrible dumb dream he had nothing to fear Rachel did not break into his apartment. She did not follow him to Seattle. The past did not catch up with him. Once he was sure of this he opened his eyes, Rachel leaned over him.

"I was wondering when you would wake up, "Rachel said.

"AHHHH,"He screamed. He jumped up. As he backed away from Rachel who sat on the king sized bed, he fell off his bed.

"R . . . R . . . Rachel," Freddie stuttered, "What are you doing here?"

"Fredster you were always so funny. I came to help you." She gently helped him from the floor to the bed.

She looked amazing. Her red hair cascaded down like a river of ginger red. Her cat-like eyes gleamed a bright neon green and cute little freckle moved across her face. She was as beautiful as she was when they last meet.

"No, I put you in danger. You should hate me. You _do _hate me. Do not lie," Freddie exclaimed. It almost hurt to look at her.

"I do not hate you! Is that what you thought? When you left, I was so scared he had done something to you. Is that why you did not call? You are an idiot," Rachel shakes her head in disappointment.

"I cannot believe you would think I would hate you. If anything I feel the exact opposite of hate." She said shyly.

"How did you get in the apartment?" Freddie said quizzically. He was still hung over the fact she did not hate him.

"Your door was unlocked." She said simply. She laid on the bed.

"How did you find me?"

"I actually moved here this week. My friend said that she saw you attended Ridgeway High school. You know how my dad is rich right. Well I bribed the school secretary to give me any information on males turning 16 in two weeks. There were only three and I narrowed it down to you." She said hastily.

"Yeah, I convinced my Dad to move around a lot so I could find you." Rachel said. She grabbed Freddie's arm and pulled him on top of her.

"So we could be friends, forever, "She said with a somewhat of a creepy smile. Freddie also started to remember some other reasons why he did not want Rachel to know where he lived. She was always kind of clingy and . . . creepy. She would always cling to him at school no matter how much he tried to keep to himself. She rather forced the secret out of him to. He got off her.

The up side was that she was hot.

"Freddie," Rachel said. Her hand shakily touched his face looking at his eyes, "What happened?"

"My father," he did not have any desire to explain further. She just gently touched his face.

Freddie was staring to get uncomfortable the way she was staring. He started to remember when Sam stared at him. He felt as though he could keep her gaze all day but with Rachel, he just wanted to get away from gaze as soon as possible.

"Ugh, Rachel remembers the last time you were in my house? Jeff was furious. You have to get out of here," Freddie said frantically. Although he knew, Jeff would not come until late in the night he knew Rachel needed to leave.

"But I don't wanna," she said stubbornly.

"Well then I'll be the one to pay for it," He whispered to her.

Rachel suddenly tensed up.

"I will leave but here," She gave him a small rectangular card with her number on it, "We will meet up again." She then strutted out the room. Before she could walk out the apartment door he ran to her, "How did I end up on the bed anyway?"

"You fainted," she said with a small smile. Freddie sheepishly grinned. She opened the door wide.

She gave him a big huge then gently kissed him on the check.

She then strutted down the hall and out of sight. Freddie stayed in the doorway looking into the empty space were Rachel just were.

How did Freddie feel about that?

It would only make sense they got together. She was pretty much the only person who knew about his father.

Freddie did not know. Just like everything else in his life, this was a mystery.

_**Sam's P.O.V**_

How could Carly ask such a question? They had known Fred for three days! How could she even imply such a thing? Sam felt offended . . . outraged . . . flabbergasted!

Ha-ha flabbergasted . . . that is a funny word.

There is no way she liked Fred. No way at all, not even in a billion years.

Sam had just walked away from Carly when she asked her the question. Sam creaked the door open softly to leave Carly's apartment when she saw them.

Freddie was hugging some red haired girl.

That could be a friend, Sam thought. The girl then gave him a kiss on the check.

_That little bimbo Barbie. _Sam grimaced. Freddie just stood there dazed. Then Sam decided to open the door fully.

"Hey, Fred," Sam scowled.

"Hey Sam, "Fred said nervously.

"Sam I did not mean it when I said . . . "His voice trailed off. Sam now once again remembered what he had said to her. Sam started to feel nervous.

"I did not mean it, but, "He leaned in really close and held her by her shoulders, "You cannot tell anyone please," He pleaded. Sam sighed. She walked into his apartment, pulled him in, and shut the door.

Freddie looked petrified she was in his house. Sam looked around. Sam remembered this place used to have bright colors with a homey aura. Now it is just creepy!

No décor hung on the walls. Just basic furniture sat in the room; bland and colorless.

"Look at least tells me what happened," She said. Now she was the one pleading she had to know!

Freddie dazed out for a minute. Sam snapped her fingers to get him back.

"My mother she was abusive. She did this all to me. She was a drunk also. I do not cut myself and these are all old. I am not in pain anymore," Freddie said emotionlessly. Sam could not read his face. He then gave her a big exaggerated smile.

"What about the word Sinner that was carved on your back," Sam said.

This time his faced faded into an angry expression.

"I think it is time for you to leave," Freddie said he opened the door.

Sam gasped.

Freddie turned around to see Jeff standing there. His eyes furiously glared at Sam then . . . him.

His arms bulged. His eyes squinted. He was mad.

"So you have a friend over I see," He gazed over to Sam, "Would you like to stay for a little game me and Freddie like to play. It's called the _punishment _game."

_**Thank You for all the support**_

_**More reviews**_

_**These chapters for VeVe2491 thank you for your enthusiasm**_


	13. Chapter 13

HEYYYY

I LOVE ALL THE REVIEWWWSS!

YOU ARE ALL AWEESSOOOMMMEEEEEEEE!

HERE'S THE CHAPTER YOU HAVE BEEN BEGGING ME FOR

Part 1

_**Freddie P.O.V**_

Freddie felt a little sick. Nauseous is the word for it.

Jeff had asked Sam if she had wanted to play the punishment game.

Jeff would not do it. He would not hurt Freddie's friend. Then again, he would have done it to Rachel what makes Sam any different. Nothing she is just like the rest Jeff's little toys; he thinks he can toy with anyone he pleases. Not with Sam or any of his friends for that matter, Freddie had to take control of the situation.

"She cannot she has to go home," Freddie said quickly. He grabbed her hand and started to push past his father.

"No I do not," Sam said innocently, "I am completely free."

"What is the punishment game anyway?" Sam asked quizzically. Jeff gave her an unnatural smile. It was as if it was not supposed to be there. It looked weird like a puzzle piece that does not fit.

"It is a surprise." His lip curled up into a mysterious grin.

"Freddie takes her into your room until I'm done preparations," he showed them off into his room. In the corner of his eye, Freddie could see Jeff chain the door.

Freddie swung his room door open. He frantically thought. What could he do?

Freddie softly shut the door. He looked at Sam; she sat on his bed gazing in amazement in his room.

He did not know what she found so intriguing. His room was a pale blue. He had placed a small circular throw rug on the floor, which was the only decoration in the room. There were nothing but empty shelves, yet she sat there in amazement as if it was a grand palace covered with shimmering gold.

Freddie seemed to calm down as he looked at her. He took a deep breath, walked towards Sam, and sat on next to her on the bed. Their arms touched.

Sam seemed to be much more aware of his presence. She became stiff. Freddie smiled at her reaction and then inched away.

"Look when Jeff . . . I mean my Father calls us in the living room say you have to go. That your Mom is waiting for you outside the apartment building."

"Why," she asked stubbornly.

"Because my Father's very uncomfortable around guest and . . . ugh really embarrassing,"

"Well if he's embarrassing then I have to stay," Sam smiled angelically.

She was doing this on purpose!

"Sam," Freddie said in a _much _more threating voice. She shifted nervously on the bed. She looked like she was about to jump up and attack like a scared cat.

"You cannot tell me what to do; you know what does your Father know about the scars? I am going to tell him. I will find out the truth. I will find out everything you're hiding you don't hide nothing from Momma," she said threatening me right back.

"You better not do that." Freddie would hear his voice turn menacing.

"He doesn't know! That means you probably did this to yourself. That's sick you need help I'm telling your father right now." She started to get up but I grabbed her by the arm bringing her back down.

Freddie could feel the anger boiling inside him. How could this girl make assumptions?

This insolent girl would get him punished by his Father. By the looks of it, she would just tell Jeff sooner or not but not if she was _dead._

The word creep in his brain. He started to shake violently. It was all anger that boiled inside him that was buried inside him for so long.

_How could his father do this to him?_

_Why is this life?_

_**Why do I sometimes have the urge to kill?**_

He grabbed her shoulders, throws Sam on the bed, and snuck in close.

He could feel his fingernails digging in her skin.

"You cannot tell anyone," Freddie started to tremble as his hands crept closer to her neck.

"Freddie," Sam's voice cracked with fear.

"You know what he will do to me," Freddie said in barely a whisper.

"There will be so much pain and blood.

Pain

Blood

Pain

Blood" Freddie repeal said.

He started to slight pressure to her throat. She started to kick him.

He applied more pressure. She made a gagging noise. She then punched him in the eye. He fell back and then suddenly snapped into his senses. It had happened _again . . . _

Sam just sat there on the bed gazing into the air breathing heavily.

Tears escaped her eyes.

"Sam," Freddie got up to apologized6.

Sam just got up from the bed and walked farthest she could from Freddie and left the room.

He could here Sam shut the door.

She was out and safe from his Father but it was not her father she was running from it was him.

_**Sorry I am really busy with school so that is all my schedule today will allow me but since it was so short I'm revealing a new chapter around 6:00.**_

_**To give you a little explanation:**_

_**In this book, physiological problems such as being a serial killer are hereditary. I know that that fact is not true but just go along with it. That sort of thing has happened before to Freddie. **_

_**Therefore, Freddie has some killer in him and it was the way he was raised (for 2 years) not his fault. **_

_**No, he has not killed a people . . . well . . . **_

_**PART 2 TOMORROW**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Sam P.O.V**_

_**Just left Freddie's apartment**_

Sam was not sure what happened in there.

_What had just happened? _

When Freddie pushed her on the bed Sam, he put his face so close. She thought he would kiss her but instead he wrapped his hands around her neck. Sam quickly used self-defense. She did not know what to think. Fred had just tried to kill her. He was so afraid of his father finding out. Fred had barely come near to killing her but as the say it was the thought that counts.

Sam had just stood in front of Fred's door staring at it then it swung open.

She expected to see Fred begging for forgiveness but it was his Father.

He stood there gazing at Sam with his black eyes there were like swirls of ink. He had stubble all across his chin his face strained in thought.

"Sam," he finally said, "You won't stay for the game."

"No Mr. Kress . . . ugh no . . . U just Ugh got to Um go, She started to head down the hallway until Mr. Kress grabbed her arm.

He leaned a bit close staring at her neck, "Did Fred do that?" His voice dripping in anger

Sam for some unknown reason said, "Yes."

She did not know what possessed her to tell the truth to this creepy ass person. Maybe it was his eye's that stared at her . . . challenged her.

"Not again," He said he dropped her arm and placed his hand on his head.

"Again," she asked quizzically. Jeff turned around.

"Well," he answered without hesitation as if he had known she would ask that or had planned to say it. She swore she saw the corners of his mouth curl up, "After the accident with his mother I presume you know about it," He looked at me.

"Well I think he's mentioned it about his mother abusing him but he did not go into detail."

Jeff shook his head, "Such a secretive boy well after that traumatic accident I took him into custody but it seemed more and more each day he behaving worse. He would beat up kids at school for lunch money and do all sorts of horrendous tings. He only had one friend her name was Rachel there were very close. I think they were dating at one point," Mr. Kress looked at her for her reaction, "Well he knows he's not supposed to have anyone in the house but one day he had brought Rachel home while I was not there. I am not sure why he did it but one night I came home and found him choking Rachel. He was screaming such terrible things. That poor girl had passed out she was not dead but still passed out."

Sam must have had a horrified expression on her face by now.

"I was horrified seeing his hands wrapped around her little neck almost choking her to death,"Mr. Kress said almost nonchalantly.

"Well after we had dropped her to the hospital we had run away for his own safety. He can be violent sometimes," Mr. Kress said. He looked at his watch. "Well I have to start dinner. Have a nice afternoon,"Mr. Kress turned around and shut the door.

What a strange man telling her that information and then just leaving with a 'Have a nice afternoon'

How in the world can I have a nice afternoon when I just found out my new 'friend' had just attempted to kill me and another girl! Sam's head was starting to hurt just like her heart. She liked Fred and was starting to feel completely again but then just like that, her joy was ripped from under her.

Interrupting her depressing ramble What's My Name started to ring loudly in the empty hallway echoing off the picked up her phone.

"Hello Sam, This is Ms. Humble." Sam started to ponder had they had figured out it was her who had put dirt in the coffe machine in the teacher's lounge?

"Your Saturday detention had been moved to tommorw because of a faculty meeting,"

"Are you serious come on I got stuff to . . . ," There was a click. She had hung up on me. The gum popping _twat _had hung up on me. I made a mental note to put some worms in her sandwitch or some kind of lame joke she could not get blamed for.

As if she had enough stuff on her plate now she got to deal with her gay, perverted, molester, _wanker,_ principal.

_**I apologize for shortness I will come up with something soon.**_

_**Im getting a little uhh writers block but I will over come it!**_

_**And look up the definition of twat and wanker.**_

_***smiley face**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**Seal of Revisement***_

_**Hello, I am so sorry that I have not updated in a while. I had all these basketball games; and by the way, our team sucks we have not won a game all season. *sad face***_

_**Well here is the chapter**_

_**(SHOUT OUT TO WOLFLOVER123 YOUR IDEA ROCKED MY MULITICOLURED SOCKS!) - P.S. - Ill pm you about it later**_

_**Did you people know! I had recently fell in love with criminal minds and one of the episodes season 2 episode 14- 15 I think**_

_**The UN sub – the serial killer, story is dangerously close to mine**_

_**Does that mean this story is a cross over? I also used some other ideas from the show in this chapter . . . . That I did not intend to use,**_

_**Hmmm**_

_**Disclaimer: I own neither I Carly nor Criminal Minds**_

_**(Beating and Punishments are two different things in this story**_

_**Beating- mild things everyday parents do to over discipline kids **_

_**Spankings**_

_**A light slap**_

_**A belt and so forth**_

_**(The older he gets the harder the beatings are and defiantly less legal)**_

_**Punishments- involve torture tools such as **_

_**Knifes**_

_**Whips **_

_**Crowbars; very intense and very painful and so not legal)**_

_**(Caution- this memory is very detailed and is one of the worst memories he has- Caution) and the last memory I will show you I'm getting sick of these**_

_._

_Freddie had just woken up. He was tied up in think ropes that cut into his arms. He was in the backseat on a pickup truck. He could barely see in the darkness of the light but he manage to see the highway emergency lights that lined up along the high way and the large green sign that said, You Are Now Leaving . . ._

_In the front seat of the car was his kidnapper. He had a crooked nose that stood irregularly on his face with thin greasy black hair that was tied up in a ponytail. Then it hit Freddie this was the man who had killed his mother. This man had beaten her to death. Unable to control his rage he screamed._

"_YOU KILLED HER YOU BASTARD!" _

"_What," Jeff said annoyed that I had screamed so loud._

"_YOU KILLED MY MOTHER YOU DIKEHEAD" The man's face froze. His face intense face stared at Freddie with an interest that chilled him._

"_What are you talking about?" He said casually._

"_I remember everything. You came in and beat my mother to death. You're a psyche pervert."_

_The pervert's nose flared up in anger. He raised his hand and smacked Freddie across the face . . . hard. He stared at me with a sinister look on his face. "Is that any way to talk to your father," He smiled coldly._

_Freddie's world suddenly crashed. His face seemed to hurt more and the leaft over pieces of his broken heart turned black._

_This pervert must be lying there's no way that can be true. _

"_My name is Jeff Benson. I know your mother told you of me vaguely but you know of me. She used to read you a story at night. Telling you that your father was a shining knight who was a knight of God._

_That I died on a heroic mission of faith and I was sent up to heaven then I became an angel of missions."_

_Freddie started to shiver at the accurateness._

"_Aren't I right? I am your father whether you want me to be or not."_

"_YOU'RE A FUCKING LIAR. "_

"_DON'T YOU EVER SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY. I am your father. I had to do it you have to understand._

_Your mother had become a sinner over time. A sinner could not raise you. I had to bring you up right. "_

"_You can do whatever you want you sick bastard but I'm not a part of it."_

_Freddie than took the small knife that had belonged to his mother when she was young on the streets and jumped at the pervert._

_While his 'father' was talking, (he preferred the word pervert) Freddie had been cutting the rope with the small knife. He had managed to be free by the second sentence._

_He knew it was dangerous they were on a high way but he rather dies in a car accident than some perverts clutches. He messily started swishing the knife around._

"_Shit," he screamed. Freddie had successfully cut the man's arm. A deep gash squirted blood. _

_He drove off to the side of the road. The pervert grabbed a baseball bat that sat ready at the bottom of the passenger seat._

"_You're not going anywhere," Jeff took a baseball bat and slammed it across his head. Freddie sank. Thinking about of all people why did it have to be him. _

_When he woke up, he was lying face down on the kitchen table. Leather straps tied down his arms and legs and another leather strap was tied around his torso. _

_Jeff entered the room._

"_You know you will never remember this." He pulled a small white bottle and pushed it in my face._

"_This is called Diorphan otherwise known as the memory lose drug. They use this in the army on terrorist. I am going to use this to erase your memory. The thing about this is it has to transfer to the brain through blood." He picked up a butcher knife and slightly moved it along his back. Without another word, he picked up the knife and sliced into his skin. He made to curves then stopped. It seemed to last forever. The pain agonizing. After 20 minutes he stopped, "want to look," He took a camera and took a picture. The sick bastard and showed it to him. Freddie started to scream when he saw it horrified at the sight of the ghastly red gushing writing on his back. _

_SINNER_

_He screamed terrified.  
"You thought that hurt just wait until I put in the Diorphin," He throw the liquid all over his back. At first it just stung then it felt like someone had thrown acid on his back and it was BURNING off his skin. He could feel the liquid move through his body. Acid in his veins_

_He's head suddenly lit on fire. The pain was exqrustiating and the worst part was that Jeff stood there and laughed . . ._

_**Ok I know what you are thinking**_

_**What is the point of redoing it?**_

_**(GalnKay thank you for pointing it out because if someone had not critized I probably would not have done anything) **_

_**Well I did not find this chapter satisfactory because to me it did not make sense. I find this version is better.**_

_**Thank You**_


	16. Chapter 16

_**HAHAHAHAH**_

_**He don't remember a thing OMG**_

_**I have the next chapter under editing so it will come soon.**_

_**ENJOY**_

_**Sam P.O.V**_

Sam was never a person to keep a grudge . . . unless she got back at them first.

That's what she would do she thought as she walked into the school. She had twisted and turned all night decideing what she would do. The truth was she knew it was a mistake that he did not mean to do it. She knew because while he was"strangling" her he was crying. That's not something a sociopath would do . . . she thought. The problem was that the situation scared her. Once she had ran out that door . . . she had forgiven him. It was as if all anger, doubt, and frustration towards Fred had dissappeered in the blink of an eye and that scared her. How could she forgive a person who had choked her? He bearly choked her but as they say 'it is the thought that counts'

Then there was the that information that Mr. Kress had given her. How can she ignore that but Sam could not find herself to believe it. Mr. Kress did not seem to be the most trustworthy person. She would not believe that Fred had done that until he said it himself.

So sam would deal with this the old fashion way. She would get fred back and hard. She just needed to know what. Would she steal his pants while he's at gym forcing him to walk in his gym shorts? Maybe if she took his gym shorts to . . .

While Sam sat there having a very heated conversation on Fred's gym shorts. Fred stared at her. Sam was completely unaware of the haunted and scared thoughts that ran through his head

_**Freddie's P.O.V**_

On the way to Ms. Briggs class Fred spotted Sam. Racing emotions almost overcame his body to run through the crowd of people towards her and then get on his knees and beg forgiveness but Freddie couldn't feel anything. He was numb. How could he do that to her?

How could his Father do that to him? Last night after Sam had left Jeff had bursted into his room looking furious.

What was he mad for? Jeff had no idea what had happened in that room or did he?

Freddie didn't have time for that. For once he had to stop mouning about his terrible life and solve a problem! He liked the sound of that not grieving and moping but doing something to make his crappy life better. He walked faster almost breaking out into a sprint towards Sam. She was only 5 feet away when someone jumped in front of him!

He collided with the person and they tumbled down to the floor.  
Whoever she was he crashed into they were in a very awkward position. Their legs and arms were tangled togeather. He laid on top of her. She was faced towards the ground.

He quickly struggled to get up but it just made things worse. When their arms untangled she dragged herself from underneath him and he struggled to get up but ended up tripping over his feet. He stretched out his hand to catch his fall but ended up just gropping the girls butt. He immediately removed his hand but unfortnatly the girl wore a small skirt. So when he moved his hand so fast the skirt flipped up revealing lace underwear.

"Holy Fuck!" He usually did not curse but this was a special accastion.

"I am so sorry." He then the girl up. He was careful not to touch anywhere unneccasary.

"What the fuck you don't just grope a girls bu . . ." Her sentence unfinished.

He noticed. Her hair was long bright red that cascaded down to her back like a waterfall full of thick blood.

It was Rachel.

"Oh Freddie," Fred was wide-eyed. She was calling him his nickname, "It's you well I never knew you were so touchy touchy. Well in a year a person can change well I like this person." She gave him a sly wink.

"Rachel it's not like tha . . ."

"Save it," she interrupted, "I know you like me. You always did. Nows not any different unless you have a girl in your life."

"I don't but still . . ."

"Perfect that we should go to the schools festival this Saturday togeather. It's a date"

"RACHEL I DON'T LI . . ." the bell of course rung loudly over powering his voice.

"Oh shit Im late see you Saturday."

She than ran off into thee other direction. How did this happen? When he headed towards Ms. Briggs class he saw Sam stand there and look at him incredously. Oh no did she hear all of that! Did she SEE any of that?

She's going to think im a pervert or worse think I like Rachel. Well actually he sort of did but she changed to much now she was so pushy and annoying!

"Sam," He called out. Once he said her name like waking up out of a fog she snapped back in reality and walked into class. HE ran after her inside Ms. Briggs class but once he walked in Ms. Briggs screamed, "LATE."

"What I just got here?"

"Detention after school Mr. Kress," He scowled. He then walked to the back of the classroom and sat right next to Sam.

"I want quiet in this room, self study NOW"

Freddie sighed and grabbed his science study guide out to study for the test he forgot about.

_**Sorry i have not updated in forever!**_

_**my computer had a virus and all my memory had deleted from my computer~!**_

_**sorry soo short though!**_

_**IM BACK NOW! IM GOING TO BE ON SCHEDULE REGULARLY**_

_**EVERY FRIDAY IF IM A DAY LATE ALL OF YOU ARE ALOD TO LEAVE MEAN PM MESSAGES!**_

I HAVE A NEW YOUTUBE ACCOUNT HAD IT FOREVER BUT JUST NOW MADE A CHANNEL; ALL ABOUT SEDDIE!

.com/user/tania19966?feature=mhum

heres the link.

a/n ohh and wolflover I am sooooooooooioioooooo interested I spelled so


	17. Chapter 17

**After School**

**Fred POV**

Fred was staring to get sick of Ms. Briggs . . . fast. She was mean-spirited. He was a second late to class and he had to serve detention. The nerve of that woman Fred was having a serious mental break down here and all she could do was sit there and eat a tuna roll salad and scream at him every time she got the chance.

"Hours up," She said suddenly.

"Finally," Freddie groaned. He's legs were starting to hurt from sitting in the uncomfortable chair. He got up and stretched.

"Well than I hope in this hour you thought about the importance of being on time." Fred just stared at her blankly wondering if he should answer her.

"Well did you," In a bad mood and he did not even try to lie.

"Not really," He than walked out the room before she could respond. Fred chuckled at his confidence.

'I think Sam is rubbing off on me.' Fred thought. Fred strolled down the hall taking his sweet time. Then he remembered Sam had a detention today. He knew it would be over about now so he headed over to the school office. Ms. Humble was no where to be found. Probably went home. He than sat in the chair and waited for Sam to come out. He didn't wait long for Sam rushed out of the Principle office. Her hair was a mess. Her makeup slightly screwed up.

"What happened to you?" He almost went to touch her but her restrained himself. Although it was so hard not to take that helpless being that stood in front of him and hold her in his arms.

"Oh Fred nice to see you joined us," Said a very tense voice. Fred spun around and saw the Principle standing behind him.

"Mr. Cooper What happened to Sam?"

"She just got into a little uh accident that's all. . ."

"Really," Fred said unbelievably. He looked over at Sam who had silent tears running down her face.

"That looks like something more that an 'accident' happened"

"Look Sam is not finished her detention," Mr. Cooper grabbed hold of her arm. Sam suddenly started to burst into tears. Fred than ripped Mr. Coopers hand away from.

"No this detention is over," Fred grabbed Sam hand and led her out of the school and into his green Volvo car.

Freddie than started the engine and drove away. Fred's anger boiled. It was only until minutes later he simmered down.

He than finally got the courage to ask, "What happened,"

"Nothing," she replied half-heatedly

"Don't give me that crap!" Freddie shouted, "You were crying and sobbing. You cringed every time he looked at you. When he touched you . . ."

"Nothing happened okay. I was just bitching around. He wanted to work and then I started crying and stuff. I was just being retarded."

Fred had enough. He hated the lies. He wished for once someone would trust him enough with the truth. He pulled to the side of the rode violently. It was near nothing just woods. He got out the car and walked over by a tall towering oak tree and sat underneath it. He just sat there. He had the car keys so she could not go anywhere. Since the school was far from her house she had to wait. It seemed like hours before Sam got out of the car and walked over. She was scarily quiet.

Fred stood.

"Tell me,"

"I can't,"

"Tell me,"

"No,"

"Tell me,"

"NO"

Fred now getting frustrated. He took her by the shoulders and gentle sat her down. Fred quietly sat down next to her. He than put his arm around her gently. She than started to cry so loud that the trees seem to quiver, the earth seemed to shake, his heart started to shatter. He couldn't take it. He than wrapped his arms around her protectively. He brought up his head and looked into her brown eyes. He then said something someone never said to him. Word he wished some one had, "Everything will be alright,"

"How do you know,"

"Because I will never let anything else happen to you,"

She than nestled into his chest. "I knew you would understand,"

She didn't say it but I knew. That bastard had molested Sam.

If you knew anything about my family you would know you don't mess with us.

I will **kill** the next person to lay a hand on Sam and I always keep my promises.

**Hoped you liked.**

**To make up for my totally unnecessary long hiatus In trying to update more often than necessary!**

**Subscribe to my you tube channel**

**.com/user/tania19966?feature=mhum **


	18. Chapter 18

**Fred POV**

Fred held her close. Sam smelled like bittersweet pineapples.

Bittersweet pineapples

Fred's head started to spin. His body started to shook uncontrollably. What was this happening to his body. His body was reacting to Sam and not in _that _way. Just being near her his body started to tremble. Tears came to his eyes, what the hell was going on. Then it happened at the worst possible moment when Sam and Fred were finally getting close the screaming appeared. Just as usual that ones woman's voice screamed the loudest but this was different her screams seemed to get louder. It almost split his head open. It hurt so much. He could feel the veins in his neck bulge. Fred was starting to get scared. It wasn't stopping. He let out a terrified scream. He was staring to become less and less aware.

**Sam POV**

One moment she and Fred were having a nice moment. Fred was comforting her in her time of need, the next moment he was gripping her so tight she couldn't breath. First she thought that it might be another murder attempt but then he started to scream blood-freaking murder. She could almost feel her ears melt. He then suddenly let go of her and began to curl on the ground in the fetal positions. He rocked back and forth tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Fred," Sam started to shake him almost violently. He didn't look good the veins in his neck and head were bulged. His face a dark violet color. He grabbed Sam suddenly almost throwing her down to the floor with him. She was face directly next to him.

"Mommy," Fred whispered silently.

"Who are you talking to,"

"Mommy sing me a song," It suddenly dawned her that he was talking to her.  
"What the what Fred do I look like your Momma,"

"Mom sing me a song . . . please," Silent tears ran down his cheeks. Sam was about to tell him off but obviously Fred was out of it. Suddenly Sam remembered a song that Freddie played at his last funeral. The last song that he probably ever sung. Sam was never extremely proud of her singing voice but her mom always told her that her voice had true country ring to it. At that moment Sam sung with all her heart.

When I see your smile  
Tears run down my face  
I can't replace  
And now that I'm strong  
I have figured out  
How this world turns cold  
and it breaks through my soul  
And I know I'll find  
deep inside me  
I can be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all (though it all)  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Sam stopped. She couldn't seem to recall the rest of the words. She sheepishly started to hum the rest of the song. Sam started to realize Fred was looking better. He was only mumbling to himself. Sam leaned in close to hear what he was saying.

"Don't hurt me, Please don't hurt me," he whined. Suddenly Fred mistreatment as a child seemed a lot more real. He seemed a lot more vulnerable now less secretive. Sam thought of something. What now Sam were to take a little or a giant peek at Freds body. Not for no peeping tom reasons you weird people but to see if she had been imagining some of those scars. Sam slipped away from Freds grip. She slowly got up and vigorously stretched for a moment. She wiped away any remaining tears underneath her eyes. She couldn't believe she cried in front of Fred. She knew this guy for a few days and she showed him and shared with him more than she had ever showed Carly. Carly had seen Sam cry once and even then it was barely about anything serious. Sam wanted to know what was so special about this guy in particular that made her tick.

Sam than with a new found determination pulled up Fred's shirt. Once again tears sprang to her eyes. Sam forgetting the point of being inconspicuous. She ripped at the thin cotton shirt ripping it in half tearing it off Fred's body. She had seen perfectly that day. There were _whip marks all across his body_. She crumpled to her knees. Tears fell down her cheeks and she thought she had it bad. This guys life must have been hell. She touched his back and gently tracing the **sinner** letters one by one as if hoping to heal them. Sam wasn't one to pray but _may god help this poor soul. _

**Fred POV**

Fred was starting to recover consciousness. The screaming had subsided. He hoped that every time that would happen he had almost died. When Fred found the strength to open his eyes found himself looking at Sam who was crumpled next to him looking at him in tears. Her hand touched his back. She was looking at his scar. She was tracing the letters. He was about to rip her hand away but it brought some type of comfort. This was a side of Sam he never had seen. She was nurturing like a mother. Sam saw him looking at her. She immediately ripped her hand away from him back but Fred just grabbed her hand wordlessly. He grabbed her into a hug. They laid on the floor and he hugged her tight. He grabbed her hand again and put it on the scars again. She got the memo and started to trace the letters again. He closed his eyes and basked in her body warmthed.

**Both POV or Narrator POV . . . whatever**

They both found the spot so comforting. They were both hurted souls. They were comforting each other. It was so soothing that both of them slipped into unconsciousness.

_**I really had to write a cute seddie scene or I was going to explode all this drama and I had no seddie scenes. Shame Shame Shame**_

_**Well I hope you enjoyed my making up for my very very very late chapters**_

_**subscribe to my youtube channel**_

.com/user/tania19966?feature=mhum


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N – This is a 4 or 3 part chapter called the school festival. This is a big one PAY ATTENTION**_

_**TO THIS ONE!**_

_**Today is Freddie's Birthday/death day **_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly nor the word kumquat **_

_**School Festival**_

_**Part 1 – The Birthday Surprise? **_

_**Freddie POV**_

Fred woke up from his heavy sleep. It had been a day since Fred had cried on Sam. Since Fred had revealed his vulnerability to her. The fact that Sam knew of the horrors that Fred had been to sent tingles down his spine. Even though she didn't know half of the story she knew enough. Living in lies all his life is exhausting being able to let go and just be himself for that day was refreshing. Although they had fallen asleep in each others arm until morning. The morning was extremely awkward. It's like when you have the time of your life at an amusement park goofing off and messing around then you have to wake up in the morning at face reality. You have to face the fact that those moments of fun and serenity come but go faster and even though you always promise yourself to cherish each second of that time you never do. That's how Fred felt he hadn't felt that type of warmth and love in such a long time. He felt terrible that he hadn't cherished it longer. Fred could still smell the bittersweet pineapples in her hair.

Fred looked at the clock that read 12:36 pm. Wow it was starting to get late. Fred got up finally from his comfortable bed. He stretched his muscles. He than took a quick shower grabbed some clothes and went to his kitchen. He was surprised to find his father there eating cereal. Jeff was never up this early he usually gets up around 2:00. This was strange. Well not wanting to stay with him one more minute Fred went automatic to the door before he could turn the knob Jeff called for him.

"Come here," Fred groaned but went to his side none the less. Yet Jeff barely acknowledged Fred's existence he sat and ate his cereal gayly. After 5 minutes of watching him eat Fred got frustrated.

"Yes,"

"Fred" Jeff turned to him taking a dramatic pause. What a drama queen . . .'

"I'm going into the city today it . . . has to do with the mission. Its going to take me all day so I won't be back until tomorrow."

"You never told me what the mission was . . .," Jeff scoffed impatiently.

"Well your ugh . . . mother had an inheritance. In her will it says only you can take it out when you 30. Which is absurd! We need the money now! Why wait until then so I'm seeing a . . . specialist to see if there is a way around the contract"

"Oh Well . . .," He was interrupted by the loud obnoxious ringing of his cell phone. He checked his messages

_**Text messages**_

_**Sam – GET YOUR TECKY NERD BUTT TO CALYS HOUSE!**_

_**Carly- Come to my house for a surprise!**_

_**Gibby- Do you know if you can still eat cheese after it turns green . . .**_

_**Gibby- DON'T REPEAT DONT EAT CHEESE AFTER ITS GREEN**_

There was something wrong with Gibby but that was something he wasn't going to dwell on. Fred not wanting Jeff to know where he was going because even though he hadn't said it Jeff didn't approve of them. Fred made a quick remark that he was leaving knowing Jeff wouldn't care where. He made a quick exit. Before knocking on Carly's door Fred swipe his hand along his messy unbrushed hair he started to wish he took more time to look nicer. He quickly shrugged it off he than knocked on the door. _Knock knock _

There was no response instead their were slight scuffling of feet he would have thought it was mice but the footsteps were louder.. He tried again. _Knock knock knock _

_**T**_his time he heard a loud crash he hastily opened the door to find Carly, Spencer, and Sam huddled over a small lamp that had fallen on the floor. Carly harshly whispered to Spencer, "Why did you drop that your dumbo,"

"I am not a dumbo it just fell out my hands because my hands are covered in butter!"

"Why are your hands covered in butter," Sam's voice making his heart jump.

"That's a grownup discussion I will never have with you," Spencer said mysteriously.

"I am sixteen I do know a little about those grown up things and I'm pretty sure _that_ doesn't involve butter,"

"What would you know about _that _your 16,"

"Well there is no butter in _that_ . . ." They both started to scream in unison arguing about _that _while Fred stood at the door watching it all.

You suddenly hear Sam scream loudly trying to over top Spencer.

"_That _ involves body parts and merchandise that prevents current _things growing inside body." _From where Fred was standing her face was a deep violet not from anger but embarrassment.

What are you talking about," Spencer said now standing straight looking on at Sam.

"You know . . . sex," Sam said embarrassed by the word.

"I was talking about the butter sculpture in Carly's room that melted," Carly who had been trying to clean the broken vase while this was going on dropped the dust pan with all the glass shards and said, "What and how is that a grown up conversations,"

Fred starting to feel uncomfortable let out a fake cough. They all stared at him their mouths a gaped. All together they raised their hands and lamely said, "Surprise,"

Fred looked around the room colorful streamers hung from the ceiling. A large colorful banner said **an iCarly Birthday Bash for Fred Kress. **Fred almost wanted to comment that the last name was wrong that it should be Benson but he disregarded the idea. Where did he even get the name Benson from. That hadn't been one of his identity's . . . had it?

Fred confused suddenly put on a face of joy. It was his birthday! He had forgotten that his birthday was here but how had they known. He know suspicious looked at them cautiously.

"How did you know it was my birthday I hadn't told you . . . ''

"We got it off Ms. Humble," Carly chimed in.

"Aren't you happy," Spencer said quizzically. Fred realized that he had just been staring at the gang. Fred was ecstatic that someone had cared enough to look for it. Jeff hadn't even remembered.

"I love it," He starting jumping up and down like an excited kid hype with sugar. He ran over to them and gave them all hugs.

"We have PRESENTS," Spencer lifted an armful of shiny wrapped gifts. Fred forgetting his manners like a Christmas child ran and grabbed the armful of presents. He sat down on the strange couch and tore at the presents.

Gibby who was not their because of food poisoning had gotten Fred a bedazzled harmonica. Fred laughed at the random and tacky gift but smiled at the thought.

Spencer and Carly had combined their money and had gotten him his own lightweight professional camera and Sony Vegas Pro 10 editor. He had been so happy he had tackled Spencer to the ground. He had given Carly a dozen small kisses on the face (A/N NOT on the lips) which had made her blush. When he was in California that's what all the girls did. He shrugged off her blush. Sam had stood and watched it all and had looked a but pissed off when he had kissed Carly wonder why?

Carly and Spencer went into the kitchen to set the table for a birthday breakfast. Sam sat on the couch looking at her gift which was wrapped in comic part of a news paper.

"Hey," Fred said gently.

Hey," Sam said sheepishly.

"That for me," He said smugly.

"No its for a space monkey," Sam growled.

"Oh! Can I meet it?"

"Ha Ha Ha You smart ass"

"If I'm a smart ass what are you?"

"Watch it . . ."

"Whatever" He said smugly.

"Don't you what ever me . . ."

"Whatever you say Princess Puckett . . ." Fred stopped for a second wondering where he had gotten that nickname. Sam looked at him strangely. She than shoved the box in his hands.

"My command is open that box," Just as she asked he ripped open the newspaper covered box. He didn't find anything expensive or random like the other gifts it was different. It was a small necklace shaped like a strange sun. It was slightly dis formed but in its own way beautiful the was it gleamed even in the dim lighting. It was held on a leather string.

"It's amazing,"

"Don't lie its not as good as Spencer and Carly's who you tackled and . . . kissed. She seemed to growl at the last part.

"Its beautiful. I love it," He had already put it around his neck.

"No you don't lier lier pants on . . ." She didn't finish her sentence. I had leaned in close and given her two small kisses on her checks. Each kiss sent electricity through his veins. When he pulled back he could only think of what it would be like to kiss her on the mouth. Fred, who was entirely ready to find out, leaned in close only inches away from her lips . . .

When he was interrupted by a loud knocking on the door.

Spencer shouted, "Come in,"

His voice like an alarm made them both jump back.

Who opened the door was nostrils flared and all Jeff.

Boy did he know how to crash a party.

_**A/n Gave you some Sedddie you happy yeahhh you happy but I ruined the moment. **_

_**You watched iOMG ahhhh i'm making a one shot collection. Dedicated to unrequited love and mutual love it will be updated every Saturday. Please support it and give me ideas for it! Also if any of you want me to continue a one shot into a story tell me because I want to start a new story just need an idea! Freddie Centric of course :)**_

_**Enjoy Rate subscibe to my youtube where you can find the link :)**_


	20. Chapter 20

Sam and Freddie jumped apart like two frightened cats, terror raced through Fred's body. He was so afraid he couldn't feel nor taste anything. Jeff had asked to join breakfast. Spencer had hesitated obviously not liking Jeff at first sight but trying not to be rude invited him in for the birthday breakfast. The breakfast went well . . . All four of them sat at the dinner table. On the table sat a ton of junk foods such as donuts, sugary cereals, fat cakes, and bacon. Jeff looked down disgusted but grabbed a donuts anyway.

"So," Jeff said in a sort of judgmental tone, "Is this what you always eat for breakfast?'

"Well no actually just for special birthdays usally it's just cereal or eggs," Spencer said cautiously obviously for no reason wanting to impress Jeff. Jeff had that sort of effect on people.

Awkward silence filled the room the only sounds were on the sounds of large chomps of bacon from Sam.

"Well Uh Mr. Kress what do you do for a living," Carly said trying to break the silence.

Jeff cleared his throat obviously thinking of a lie, "Well I work with the food donation administration making sure we have enough food in stock and making sure everything is quality brand," Everyone at the table awed at his job even Fred was impressed with the lie.

"I didn't know people got payed for that,"

"Yeah well," Jeff said trying not to get into the details.

"Well," Spencer said trying not to fall into an awkward silence again, "So uh where is Fred's mother? If not to be rude"

"Well actually Fred's mother was killed. I have to say she deserved it," Sam stopped eating and looked over at Jeff, Spencer looked at him confused, "Fred's mother had abused him when he was little it was terrible what she did to him really," Fred knew why he did this so if any of them had ever seen a scratch he could say it was old. Jeff always had a reason always had a agenda.

"Father," Fred said for the first time speaking, "Why didn't you leave for your trip yet?"

Jeff seeming to be irritated by his question answered it none the less, "My car broke down waiting for my friend Scars to give me a ride,"

"Scars?" Spencer said questioningly. BEEP BEEP BEEP Jeff's pager rang, "That must be him, I'll see you guys later."

Jeff walked out the door and all the tension in the room left with him.

"Wait Scars," Everyone laughed at Spencer's reaction to Fred's fathers friends name.

"Hey don't judge you have a friend named Socko!"

"Hey that's short for Socovious, a proper name for a young Scotish man. Whats _Scars _name?"

Fred thought about it for a second and said, "Steve" Roaring laughter filled the room everyone laughing off the tenceness of the breakfast.

"Wow, well your dad's," Carly started as the three new friends headed into her room.

Fred sighed, "Let's not talk about it,"

"Okay," Carly replied relieved, "Hey would you guys like to play Truth or Dare again? We didn't finish playing last time."

"Sure," Sam said excitadly. Fred shrugged. Not really wanting to play remembering how the last game ended with him reveiling himself to Sam. It was like he couldn't help giving himself up around her. They all sat on the bed.  
"Okay Fred you start,"

"Hm, Sam Truth or Dare,"

"Truth,"

"Who was your . . . first kiss," Fred smiled at the personal question wondering how she'd answer but he never thought that it would be like this.

Sam's eyes darkened. They had a cloud of sorrow and . . . happiness. "It was a boy named Freddie Benson and I was in love with him,"

Fred felt something that in his short years of life he never remembered feeling. It was jealousy. How special was this boy to take Sam's affection. Although he recognized the name and realized that was who everyone on his first day here talked about.

"Not your turn any more," Sam said mischievously. Fred pouted but shrugged it off none the less, "my turn."

"Fred Truth or Dare,"

"Truth,"

Now Sam was a bit more bold with her question, "Fred did you ever had sex before?"

Fred was taken back no one had ever asked him that. Even though he couldn't remember having sex he was pretty sure it was a no, "No I have never had sex before," Sam smirked, "Carly,"

"Fred, Truth or Dare," Sick or truth he picked dare.

"Fred I dare you to play seven minutes in heaven with Sam,"

God why did he feel like he was in a lame 80's movie? Fred shrugged in his old school he had done this game many times with girls behind the bleachers. He needed affection and that's where he got it. Carly immediately left the room before closing the door said, "I'll be counting,"

Now Fred always did his dares no matter what they were because he always kept a promise unlike his dumb dad. Fred leaned into Sam and inhaled her pineapple scent.

"No," She said moving farther away from Fred on the bed.

"Why not?"

"Because well I never kissed anyone but Freddie and that was once so I'm not sure if I'm good or not at it,"

"No worry's I've done it a lot," She looked at him incredously, "I mean like seven heaven,"

'Well I can't be surpraised your kind of . . ."

"of what?"

"hot,"

"Really," Fred said flattered. Fred leaned in closer his lips grazed her cheek.

"Really," Sams voice faltered, "You know don't think you're all that now cause your not I mean,"

Then Fred who was so eager to kiss Sam it was a need to.

"Sam truth or dare,"

"Truth," she muttered.

Forgetting what he was about to say he leaned in.

Just as he was about to touch her lips Carly came through the door bearing blue tea, " It hasn't been seven minutes but look I have blue tea!"

_**sORRY FOR THE LATENESS I HOPED YOU LIKED THE sEDDIE TENSION**_


	21. Chapter 21 Devil's Comin'

Freddie was seriously annoyed at the fact Carly walked in it hadn't even had been more than a minute. Carly herself looked annoyed at how close they were at the moment which confused Freddie since she had suggested the juvenile game in the first place. Sam also looked annoyed about to tell off the brunette.

"Carly - "

"Sorry, It's just I made this huge pitcher of tea and I didn't want it to get warm,"

"Why not put it in the fridge?"

"Because Sam filled my fridge with pounds of smoked ham," Carly said accusingly. Sam then moved away from Freddie now smiling remembering what she did. "I was meaning to tell you about that."

Freddie frowned at her absence of presence he missed it, he felt . . . cold. He moved closer to her there arms touching. He felt heat course through his body. If only one touch could do that, he wondered what it would feel like if he could touch more, explored her body. Freddie started to blush at the perverted thought. Why would he think that? That was such a vulgar thought and Sam didn't deserve for someone to think such thoughts about her. Yet his thoughts seemed to wonder away form the conversation and more to what would have happened if Carly hadn't interrupted.

"Fred," Sam called his name. At first Fred thought this was part of his little fantasy he had in his head.

"FRED," Sam screamed in his ear. Now that he knew wasn't imagination.

"What?"

"I've been calling your name forever, Carly said we should head out to the school carnival. It's a great way to celebrate your birthday,"

Sam said suspiciously. His face grew bright red if she knew what he was thinking. He was ashamed of himself. She wasn't a object that he could fantasize about.

"Th-that sounds l-l-like a great idea! Let's do it"Fred got up and raced to the bathroom. He closed the door and sank to the ground, he didn't know what was happening to him. He never did that before. He's never felt that heat or fantasized. It was the first time his body was genuinely attracted to someone. He was so confused and he had a feeling that it would only get worse.

**And he was right . . .**

Carly, Sam, and Fred got into the car. All of them were excited by the day ahead of them. While Carly rode shotgun, Sam and Fred sat in the backseat.

"Hey, remember I never asked you my truth question,"

"Okay what is it"

"Okay I don't know right now but when I do you absolutely have to answer!"

"Okay," Sam said with a small blush crept on her checks.

Spencer finally started to drive, Carly and Spencer started to argue about the proper way to kill a someone if you were running from the cops and they witnessed the crime and were in your way for God only knows what reasons. Carly said you strangle them while Spencer said you kill them with a knife.

"Why are they talking about this," Fred whispered to Sam.

"They talk about the strangest things. They both just like to be right."

"Well they're wrong the best way is to separate the vertebrae, by bending the person forward and yank there head with brutal force which may cause instant death if done correctly, or you could snap there neck but most people can't do it correctly."

"What," She looked at him amazed.

"Hm, I-I-I like CSI," Fred than took out a iPod he found on the street once and listen to its songs. He didn't look up until they had reached the school. He hoped this wouldn't be a disaster but this was Fred, of course it would be.

Once they reached there It was like tacky colors spit on the school. It was horrible decorated but he hoped that it would be fun.

"I'm going to the bathroom, wait for me guys," Sam said. She headed off.

"Lets have fun," Carly said to him.

"Yeah, I think it'll be lots of fun. Oh wow,"

"What?" He pointed to the projected images on the side of the school.

"I wonder what sort of projector they used. It has such great quality."

"Oh I love it when you get all techy," She laughed. The laugh sort of echoed in his head it was like something he heard much before it r

rang in his head like bells. He started to hear something in his mind. It sounded far away.

_**(Bold-Carly Underlined_Freddie All italicized dialogue from iSaved your life)**_

_**Oh I love it when you talk all techy**_

What the hell was happening it like he was recalling something. It was like remembering a conversation you had with something but your missing a part, you know its missing but you don't know how to retrieve it.

_**That was before we were . . . you know**_

Now Freddie was paying attention carefully to what was being said, He than saw a fuzzy out of reach image of a boy and girl kissing. As soon as it came it left.

_**Retreated **_

It was starting to get fuzzier. He grabbed his head and blocked his ears. He didn't know who the girl was but was she talking to me?

_You know I like you more than most soups _

That was it that was his voice he knew it

_**Wow you seriously don't want to kiss me**_

_Bacon _

The laughter sort of faded away. An excited feeling filled him up It was his first real memory but he didn't understand it. Who exactly was it? Did he actually have a girlfriend, it didn't sound like it ended well though.

"Fred," Carly's voice filled his ears. She was quite concerned.

"Sorry I get migraines frequently. I sort of breakdown into protective mode when I get one. Once started to do the same thing when I was in line for a roller coaster at 6 flags. Everyone thought I was crazy, a pentecostal woman started to say prayers as if she was exorcizing me it was that bad."

Carly laughed she was hesitant but it seemed to brighten the mood.

"Come on We'll have a great time!"

"Yeah, wait what about Sam?"

"Forget it, she'll catch up,"

_**In a location I can't even tell you**_

_**Jeff **_

Jeff was hesitant leaving him with those people but he was sure he put in enough of the poison for him not to remember. Jeff sat patiently in a abandon room. There was nothing but to chairs and a small round table. He was in a bank in the back room. It was often the place bosses would bring the employes to question them or firing them. Either way this place never did any good. He was meeting with some banker. Who was friends with Scars brother who fraternized with the Irish mob.

A man walked into the room. He had a long droopy face. Each of his fingers held an abundance of gold rings. His hair had more grease than his own and he wore a cheap white suit. God he was like a bad character from a mob movie. Who the hell did he think he was? Well He was helping him so . . .

"Hello, Jeff isn't it," He slurred with his words.

"Doesn't matter I need some money from an account."

"Which?"

"Jane Benson" He took out a small mac air from his suit case. He started t type.

"I can't,"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I THOUGHT YOU CAN OPEN ANY ACCOUNT,"

"Well," He remained calm, "This one is promised to a boy in her will its closed so tight."

"Well I have the boy,"

"You can only take it when he's 18,"

"I DONT HAVE THE TIME," He raised his eyebrow.

"What do you suggest?"

"Well she has no other family so ultimately if the boy _dies _you would get the money,"

"Are you saying all I have to do is kill the boy and I get the money,"

The man frowned. He obviously didn't think he would take the offer seriously. "Are you capable?"

" I'm offended that you would think such a thing. I won't just kill him. I'll tear him limb from limb and torture him until he bleeds to death. It is the only way to truly be cleansed."

"Like you for instance you're a vile man that needs to be cleansed." He took out his silent pistol. He took it to the mans head.

"Forgive this man and adorn his sins." He shot the pistol. He than took out a handkerchief and whipped himself off.

One more to go,

He walked off slowly singing softly,

Ain't going back to Barton Hollow  
Devil gonna follow me e'er I go  
Won't do me no good washing in the river  
Can't no preacher man save my soul

_**Creepy finish OMG **_

_**sorry I got seriously writers block but I decided this was the way to go **_

_**told you this was an important chapter,**_

_**once again serious writers block and was enjoying the summer fun guilty as charged**_

_**well actually I didnt have fun involes annoying haition girl acting like the sister I never wanted. **_

_**Sigh* **_

_**shout out to my fave author Isobe3l **_

_**she has amazing stories check em out!**_

_**I'll try to write on time again truthfully I didnt watch iCarly the whole summer I felt so guilty lol**_

_**review!**_


	22. Chapter 22 Tension

Fred was seriously confused. He had just had his first memory and suddenly everything he saw had some type of memory attached. As Carly and him walked down towards a carnival game he decided to go to Wac o' Mole. When he picked up the gavel his head felt as if someone slushed him in the face. He had a weird feeling of being cold, uncomfortable, with a splitting head ache. He saw a young Freddie being hit on the head with a gavel by a out of focused person. They looked blonde though. He had many more random memories. All irrelevant and made no sense, there was one where he saw himself dancing around foolishly while the words RANDOM DANCING screeched in his head. He wanted to lay down, to calmly take all of it in because it was to much. Every color seemed to radiate and blinded him it was as if he were seeing them for the first time. All of his senses were heightened to a new level. All the while trying to deal with this Carly talked on and on. He didn't care about her pet turtle or the fact that some Shane guy dumped her but truthfully her rambling on made it so he didn't have to talk just nod and look pretty.

"Fred, wanna go on the Ferris wheel?" Fred shook his head.

"I'm feeling sorta nausea it wouldn't be a good idea."

"Oh, Well can we stop at the bathroom I think I drank way to much orange juice," Fred nodded.

Finally for the first time this evening she shut up! She fell silent and he could hear the joyful carnival music. Fred liked Carly he did, but right now her peppy attitude annoyed him. How could one be so happy and content? Maybe Fred thought this because he had never experienced true happiness or least didn't remember it. It angered him that pain and sorrow was all around her but all she did was smile and talk about turtles.

"How can you be so happy?" Carly was taken back by the question, "What?"

"I mean . . . you know what forget it it was a dumb question."

Silence once again fell between the two but now more awkward. They walked over to the bathroom.

"Wait for me,"

"K," Before she went into the bathroom she looked back, "It's because I have to,"

"What,"

"I'm happy because I have to. When my Mom died I literally fell into a depression. I couldn't eat or sleep. Everything reminded me of her, but one day I decided I couldn't go on like that. So I thought to myself that if I could act happy all the time maybe I might become content and soon it just happened."

"What?"

"I finally became . . . happy," She than walked into the girls bathroom. Fred then leaned against the wall and sank to the ground.

"If I act happy than maybe I'll be happy," He whispered to himself.

He than heard heels clicking down the hall way he didn't bother to see who it was because he didn't care. He closed his eyes and rested them.

"Hey hot stuff," He opened his eyes to find a long red hair girl standing in front of him.

"Rachel?" Rachel was defiantly a showoff but she never got this dolled up for a school event. She wore a low cut revealing tank top and a skirt so high from his view he could see her pink lace panties. He felt the hot inside his pulse and heart beat quickened. Freddie was confused he thought Sam was the only girl that could make him feel this way, well he guessed he was wrong because his blood was pumping. He crossed his legs.

"Yeah, My first Ridge way event this is . . . fun," She said sarcastically.

"It's not that bad,"

"Not compared to the fun we used to have," Fred laughed, loud,"

"Not sure how much fun 5 kids playing 7 heaven in your basement was so fun,"

"To me," She bent down and leaned in extremely close. He saw down her shirt, matching lace bra! "Those seven minutes was better than Disney world." His hormones were ALL over the place. I guess it shows doesn't matter what pain you go through in life, puberty is puberty.

"y-y-ea,"

"Wanna play seven minutes in heaven now,"

"Uh . . ."

"I'll take that as a yes," She leaned in and her lips softly pressed against his. Rachel tasted like artificial strawberry's and mint. The kiss turned from soft to and gently to aggressive. She grabbed his head and tugged on his hair. She forced her tongue down her throat. What was a pleasant kiss turned sour fast. Freddie pushed her away gently. She frowned.

"What are you doing?"

"This isn't right," Fred said standing up

"It was amazing," She said pushing herself against him.

"You're my only real friend I don't want to do this,"

"Well I want more of you," She said as she reached down sliding her hand down his pants. He groaned in pleasure, but quickly got to his senses and smacked away her hand.

"GOSH REBECCA WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU,"

"I need you Freddie, your the only one I'll ever want or need, be with me please love me," Tears brimmed in her eyes.

This was to much he couldn't handle this right now. He smacked away her hands that found their way around his neck.

He ran around the corner and bumped into a sneaky person.

"What the Fuck,"

He looked down.

"Sam?"

She looked at him. He could see the emotions in her face change, shame, bashfulness, anger . . . jealousy?

"Who the hell is she?"

_**Hey guys what up a lot of sexual tension in this chappie but I wanted to show how much Rachel really loved Fred theres more to come!**_


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